[Transcript of "Buffy The Vampire Slayer" episode Lie To Me at buffyology.com.]
In every generation there is a Chosen One. She alone will stand against the vampires, the demons and the forces of darkness. She is the Slayer.
The playground is deserted. The carousel slowly turns and the swings move in the light evening breeze. The only person there is a boy, JAMES, sitting on the jungle gym, waiting for his ride home.
C'mon, Mom. She's always late.
Pan around him to DRUSILLA, slowly approaching him from behind.
Are you lost?
No. My mom's just supposed to pick me up is all.
Do you want me to walk you home?
No, thank you.
My mummy used to sing me to sleep at night. (sings) "Run and catch / The lamb is caught in the blackberry patch." She had the sweetest voice. What will your mummy sing when they find your body?
I'm not supposed to talk to people.
Oh. Well, I'm not a person, see, so that's just--
ANGEL suddenly appears between Drusilla and the boy.
Run home.
The boy only hesitates for a moment before running off. Drusilla watches him run away in dismay. Angel turns to face her.
My Angel!
Hello, Drusilla.
Do you remember the song mummy used to sing me? Pretty.
I remember.
Yes, you do.
Drusilla, leave here. I'm offering you that chance. Take Spike and get out.
Or you'll hurt me?
Angel looks down at the ground but says nothing.
No. No, you can't. Not anymore.
If you don't leave it'll go badly. For all of us.
My dear boy's gone all away, hasn't he? To her.
BUFFY walks along the roof, watching and listening, on patrol.
Who?
The girl. The Slayer.
Buffy senses something and heads for the edge of the roof.
Drusilla places her hand on Angel's chest.
Your heart stinks of her. Poor little thing. She has no idea what's in store.
Buffy looks over the edge and sees Angel and Drusilla standing close together. She can overhear.
This can't go on, Drusilla. It's gotta end.
Drusilla tilts her head and reaches up for a kiss.
Oh, no, my pet. This is just the beginning.
She pulls away without kissing him and walks away with an evil smile. Not understanding the situation, Buffy is heartbroken at what she's just seen. Angel watches Drusilla go for another moment, then turns to leave also. Buffy steps away from the edge of the roof and runs off.
Opening credit sequence.
Establishing.
JENNY CALENDAR and GILES are walking down the hallway, talking animatedly.
It's a secret!
What kind of a secret?
The kind that's secret. You know, where I don't actually tell you what it is.
I think it's customary that when two people are going out on an evening that they both have an idea of where they're going.
Oh, come on! Where is your sense of adventure?
Well, I... how will I know what to wear?
Do you own anything else?
Well, not as such, no...
Rupert, you're gonna have to trust me.
All right, all right, I put myself in your hands.
That sounds like fun. Okay, tomorrow night, 7:30, right?
Yes.
Buffy walks up to him as Jenny leaves and they start toward the library.
Hey.
Hello. Did we hunt last night?
I did a couple quick sweeps downtown.
Any encounters?
Nothing vampirey.
I've been researching your friend Spike. The profile is fairly unappetizing. But I still haven't got a bead on why he's here.
You'll figure it out.
You all right? You seem a little glum.
I'm fine.
They stop outside the library.
Why don't you take the night off?
Okay. That'd be nice.
Yes. You could spend some time with Angel.
I don't know. He might have other plans.
She walks off to class and Giles looks after her, concerned.
The TEACHER is conducting a question and answer session. Buffy opens a note from WILLOW:
Do you know who she was?Well, it seems like Louis XVI was just sort of a weak king.
Buffy and Willow glance at each other. Buffy starts to write an answer to the note.
That's fair enough. Any other impressions?
Pan forward to CORDELIA sitting in front of Buffy. XANDER, sitting across from her in front of Willow, looks over at Cordelia with his head propped up on his fist.
I just don't see why everyone's always picking on Marie Antoinette. I can so relate to her. She worked really hard to look that good and people just don't appreciate that kind of effort.
Buffy has finished her answer to Willow's note:
No. Dark hair. Old dress. Pretty.
And I know the peasants were all depressed--
I think you mean 'oppressed'.
Whatever. They were cranky.
Buffy folds the note and hands it back to Willow.
So they're, like, 'Let's lose some heads'. Uhhh! That's fair? And Marie Antoinette cared about them. She was gonna let them have cake!
Willow finishes another note and hands it to Buffy.
Yes, well, that's a very interesting perspective. Would anyone else like to comment?
Buffy opens the note:
Vampire?The bell rings.
Buffy, Willow and Xander come out of class.
I don't know. I don't think so. They seemed pretty friendly.
Who's friendly?
No one.
Angel and a girl.
Willow, do we have to be in total share mode?
Hey, it's me. If Angel's doing somethin' wrong, I wanna know. 'Cause it gives me a happy!
They head into the lounge.
Mm, I'm glad someone has a happy.
Aw, you just need cheering up. And I know just the thing. Crazed dance party at the Bronze!
I don't know...
Very calm dance party at the Bronze? (off Buffy's glum look) Moping at the Bronze...?
He sits on a couch next to Willow. FORD walks up the steps behind Buffy.
I'd suggest a box of Oreos dunked in apple juice, but maybe she's over that phase.
Buffy spins around.
Ford?
Hey, Summers!
They embrace.
How ya been?
Oh, my god! What are you doing here?
They let go and hold hands.
Matriculating.
Huh?
I'm finishing out my senior year at Sunnydale High. Dad got transferred.
This is great!
I'm glad you think so.
Xander is not pleased.
I didn't think you'd remember me.
Remember you? Duh! We only went to school together for seven years. You were my giant fifth grade crush.
So! You two know each other.
Oh! (turns to Xander and Willow) I'm sorry. This is Ford! Billy Fordham, this is Xander and Willow.
Buffy and Ford sit on the couch.
Hi.
Hey.
Nice to meet you!
Ford and I went to Hemery together in L.A. (to Ford) And now you're here. For real?
Dad got the transfer and boom, he just dragged me out of Hemery and put me down here.
This is great! Well, I mean, it's hard, sudden move, all your friends, delicate time, very emotional, but let's talk about me! This is great!
So, you two were sweeties in fifth grade?
Not even. Ford wouldn't give me the time of day.
Well, I was a manly sixth-grader. I couldn't bother with someone that young.
It was terrible. I moped over you for months. Sitting in my room listening to that Divinyls song I Touch Myself.
Realizing she's just shared a little to much info, she casts a nervous glance at Xander and Willow.
Of course, I had no idea what it was about. (to Ford) Hey, are you busy tonight? We're going to the Bronze, it's the local club, and you have to come.
I'd love to! But if you guys already had plans... would I be imposing?
No, only in the literal sense.
Okay, then! I gotta find the admissions office, get my papers in order.
Well, you know what? I'll take you there and I'll see you guys in French.
She takes Ford's arm and starts to lead him off.
It was good to meet you.
Xander smiles at them until they've gone. Willow has a thoughtful look on her face.
This is Ford, my bestest friend of all my friends! Jeez, doesn't she know any fat guys?
Oh, that's what that song is about?!
Xander, Willow and Ford are playing pool. Ford sinks his shot and sets up for another as Buffy arrives at the table.
Ford! You made it.
Wasn't hard to find.
Buffy, Ford was just telling us about the ninth grade beauty contest, and the... swimsuit competition.
Oh, my god, Ford, stop that! The more people you tell, the more people I have to kill.
You can't touch me, Summers. I know all your darkest secrets.
Care to make a small wager on that?
I'm gonna go get a drink. Ford, try not to talk.
She heads for the bar and finds Angel there.
Hi.
Hey! I was hoping you'd show.
You drink! I mean, drinks. Non-blood things.
There's a lot about me you don't know.
I believe that.
The pool table. They're racking them up. Ford notices Buffy with Angel.
That's Angel.
He's Buffy's beau. (sarcastic) Her special friend.
He's not in school, right? He looks older than her.
You're not wrong.
The bar.
So. What'd you do last night?
Nothin'.
Nothing at all. You ceased to exist?
No, I mean I stayed in, read.
Oh.
She goes back to the pool table without another word. Angel stands there confused for a moment, then follows her.
Didn't want that soda after all?
Not thirsty.
Hey, Angel.
Hi.
This is Ford. We went to school together in L.A.
Angel shakes Ford's hand.
Nice to meet you.
Whoa! Cold hands!
You're not wrong.
Buffy gives Xander a harsh look.
So, you're here visiting Buffy?
No, I'm actually here to stay. Just moved down.
Hey, Angel? Do you wanna play?
Y'know, it's getting really crowded in here tonight. I'm a little hot. (to Ford) You wanna take a walk?
Sure! That'd be nice.
Okay, then, (to the others) I'll see ya tomorrow.
She leads Ford out past Angel.
Good night.
Take care.
Okay, once more with tension.
He just moved here?
Yeah, and boy does he move fast.
Well, Angel, we could still play.
She moves the rack into position but when she looks back up, Angel is gone.
See, you made him do that thing where he's gone.
Buffy and Ford stroll slowly along.
So, that was your boyfriend?
No. Uh, yeah. Maybe. Could we lay off the tough questions for a while?
Sorry. So! What else do you do for fun around here?
She hears noises coming from around the corner and suspects a vampire.
My purse! I left my purse at the Bronze. Could you get it for me?
Okay.
He turns and heads back.
Good. Run! Thanks!
He starts to jog away but stops when he looks back and sees Buffy has disappeared. The sound of a woman sobbing reaches him followed quickly by a girl running past him in tears. Curious about what exactly is going on, he continues down the alley.
Suddenly a trash can comes flying out of a side alley and smashes into the wall in front of him accompanied by the distinct sounds of fighting. Then a vampire crashes into view, falling to the ground. Ford peeks around the corner in time to see the vampire swing at Buffy who ducks and retaliates, slamming a stake through his chest. The vampire staggers back into the wall and explodes into ashes.
What's going on?
Surprised, Buffy spins around to face him.
Um... there was a cat. A cat here and, um, then there was another cat... and they fought. The cats. And... then they left.
Oh. I thought you were just slaying a vampire.
What? Whating a what?
I know, Buffy. You don't have to lie. I've been trying to figure out the right time to tell you. I know you're the Slayer.
Buffy is shocked speechless.
Willow is on the phone with Buffy.
Just like that he told you?
Just like that. Said he found out right before I got booted from Hemery.
Wow! It's neat! Is it neat?
Yeah, I guess it is. I don't have to constantly worry that he's gonna find out my dark secret. It just makes everything easier.
Ford arrives at the Sunset Club. He knocks on a non-descript heavy metal door and a viewport opens. It quickly closes and the door opens to admit him.
A welder is cutting the knob off of the inside of the door. Ford goes down the stairs to the main area. Dark gothic music sets the mood and everyone is dressed in black and pale makeup. DIEGO meets Ford at the base of the stairs.
Ford? Hi, Ford?
Hey!
Well, how'd it go?
It went good.
Good? That's it? That's all we know? Well, when are we--
Soon.
Oh, soon, okay. Y'know, you could gimme a little more information here. I'm trusting you. I'm out on a limb here. Not to mention the lease is almost up on this place. Who's gonna cover that?
Marvin...
Diego! C'mon, man, it's Diego now.
Diego. (takes out a pill) Ritalin. Everything's gonna be fine.
He pops the pill as CHANTERELLE comes over and hands him a drink.
Just make sure you're ready when I say. True believers only.
I can't wait!
Right, whatever, I still think I should be in on the plan.
Diego, you gotta trust me.
A scene from a Jack Palance vampire movie playing on the TV catches Ford's attention.
A couple more days and we'll get to do the two things every American teen should have the chance to do: die young, and stay pretty.
He looks spaced out as he mouths the words of Jack Palance in the movie.
So... you play your wits against mine. Me, who commanded armies hundreds of years before you were born. Fools!
Willow's room is neat and clean and everything is in place just so, except for some clothes on her bed. She's in her nightshirt brushing her hair. She is startled by a knocking on her balcony door. She drops her brush on the bed, goes to the door and pushes the blinds apart to see who it is.
Oh! Angel! What are you doing here?
I wanted to talk to you.
Oh, well...
She gestures for him to come in but he just stands there.
Well?
I can't. Unless you invite me, I can't come in.
Oh! (nervous) Well, okay, I invite you. To come in.
She turns around as he comes in and a look of horror crosses on her face when she sees her bra just lying there on her bed out in the open. She quickly rushes over, grabs it and stashes it.
If this is a bad time, I--
No! I just... I'm not supposed to have boys in my room.
I promise to behave myself.
Okay. Good.
I guess I need help.
Help? You mean like on homework? No, 'cause you're old and you already know stuff.
I want you to track someone down. (re: her laptop) On the Net.
Oh, great! I'm so the Net Girl.
I just want to find everything I can. Records, affiliates, I'm not even sure what I'm looking for yet.
Good. What's the name?
Billy Fordham.
Angel? If I say something you really don't want to hear, do you promise not to bite me?
Are you going to tell me that I'm jealous?
Well, you do sometimes get that way.
You know, I never used to. Things used to be pretty simple. A hundred years, just hanging out, feeling guilty... I really honed my brooding skills. Then she comes along. Yeah, I get jealous. But I know people. And my gut tells me this is a wrong guy.
Okay. But if there isn't anything weird... hey, that's weird.
What?
I just checked the school records and he's not in them. I mean, usually they transfer your grades and stuff, but he's not even registered.
He said he was in school with you guys, right?
Let me just see if I can...
Willow? Are you still up?
Ack! Go! (to her mom) I'm just going to bed now, mom!
Angel goes back out onto the balcony. Willow holds the door.
Come by tomorrow at sunset. I'll keep looking.
Don't tell Buffy what we're doing, all right?
You want me to lie to her? It's Buffy!
Just don't bring it up until we know what's what.
Okay. It's probably nothing.
That'd be nice.
She closes the door and frets a bit, nervous about what she has to do.
Buffy and Ford enter from outside. Willow goes to the fountain for a drink.
Willow!
Willow spins around, fidgeting nervously.
What's up?
Nothing.
Do you wanna hang? We're cafeteria-bound.
I'm gonna do work in the computer lab on school work that I have, so I cannot hang just now. Hi, Ford.
Morning.
Okay, Will, fess up.
What?
Are you drinking coffee again? 'Cause we've talked about this.
Willow seizes on coffee as an excuse.
It makes me jumpy. I have to go. Away.
Buffy is taken aback.
Nice girl!
There aren't two of those in the world.
Giles meets them in he hall.
Buffy! Yes... Ms. Calendar and I are going... somewhere tonight, and she's given me the number of her beeper thingy in case you need me for study help... suddenly.
He knows, Giles.
What?
Ford knows I'm the Slayer.
I know.
Oh! Very good, yes. (pulls her to the side) Buffy... (to Ford) Excuse me. (to Buffy) You are not, by any chance, betraying your secret identity just to impress cute boys, are you?
I didn't tell him. He knew.
Oh! Right then. Well, just remember, if you--
Go! Experience this thing called fun. I'll try not to have a crisis.
Giles concedes and heads back to the library.
Buffy and Ford are strolling and talking.
And on your right, once again, the beautiful campus. I think you've now seen everything there is to see in Sunnydale.
Well, it's... really...
Feel free to say dull.
Okay. Dull's good.
Ford attention is diverted by two vampires running in the distance.
Or maybe not so dull. Is that more vampires?
Must be the weather.
She pulls out a stake and a cross, and hands the cross to Ford. He takes it and reaches into his back pocket to pull out a stake of his own. He smiles and waves it about.
Stay close to me.
She runs up the steps after the vampires and cautiously looks around. Ford is close behind, cross and stake held ready. She looks around a corner and sees nothing.
Maybe they were just passing through.
I don't think so.
A blonde female vampire grabs Buffy from behind and tries to bite. Ford takes a startled step back as Buffy snaps a high kick into her face, then grabs her by the arm and flips her over onto her back. A male vampire rushes her and grabs her, pulling her over a railing with him. She lands in a crouch on the grass below and gets up while the vampire rolls to his feet. She kicks him in the jaw, sending him reeling backward. Ford looks down at his stake and cross and then glances at the fight a moment before quickly approaching the other vampire and holding the cross in her face and the stake up and ready. She hisses at him.
You've got one chance to live. Tell me what I want to know and I'll let you go.
Below, Buffy knocks the vampire out with a punch to the face and stakes him. He explodes to dust as she runs back up the stairs to Ford, who's crouched where the vampire was.
Where's the other one?
I killed her. (coughs) I killed her and she just turned to dust. It was... amazing!
Buffy reacts with surprise.
Xander, Willow and Angel walking down the alley to the Sunset Club.
The only thing I could track down was this address. The Sunset Club. Still didn't find anything incriminating.
He leaves no paper trail, no records... that's incriminating enough.
Yeah, I'm gonna have to go with Dead Boy on this one.
Could you not call me that?
He knocks on the door. The viewport opens and the doorman looks out.
We're friends of Ford's.
The doorman nods and the viewport slips shut.
They walk in and look around. It's gloomy in the extreme.
Boy, we blend right in.
In no way do we stick out like sore thumbs.
Let's look around. You guys check out downstairs.
Sure thing, Bossy the Cow!
Okay, but do they really stick out?
What?
Sore thumbs. Do they stick out? I mean, have you ever seen a thumb and gone, 'Wow! That baby is sore!'
You have too many thoughts.
Angel looks down from the balcony and continues on around. Willow and Xander walk past a man standing in a coffin dressed as a movie vampire.
Hi!
Xander waves back and looks around more.
Are you probably noticing a theme here?
As in 'Vampires: Yay!'?
That's the one.
Chanterelle gets up and moves behind them.
You guys are newbies. I can tell.
Oh, no. We come here all the time.
Don't be ashamed! It's cool that you're open to it. We welcome anyone who's interested in the Lonely Ones.
Angel comes down the stairs behind them.
The Lonely Ones?
Vampires.
Oh! We usually call them the nasty, pointy, bitey ones.
So many people have that misconception. But they who walk with the night are not interested in harming anyone. They are creatures above us. Exalted!
You're a fool.
Xander gives him a warning look.
You don't have to be so confrontational about it. Other viewpoints than yours may be valid, you know.
Chanterelle moves off.
Nice meeting you.
They turn to Angel.
You really are a people person.
Now nobody's gonna talk to us.
I've seen enough. I've seen this type before. I mean, they're children making up bedtime stories of friendly vampires to comfort themselves in the dark.
Is that so bad? I mean, the dark can get pretty dark. Sometimes you need a story.
These people don't know anything about vampires. What they are, how they live, how they dress...
A young man dressed exactly like Angel comes down the stairs behind him and looks him up and down before continuing on. Angel clears his throat and they start up the stairs toward the exit.
You know, I love a good diatribe. But I'm still curious why Ford, the bestest friend of the Slayer, is hanging with a bunch of vampire wannabes.
Something's up with him, you're right about that.
Diego overhears them and eyes them suspiciously. The girl talking to him is confused by his reaction.
Are you okay?
Buffy walks in followed by Jenny and Giles.
Sorry to beep you guys in the middle of... stuff, but it seemed really weird.
No, you did the right thing. Absolutely.
Jenny stops in her tracks.
You hated it that much?
No! But vampires on campus is-- could have implications. Very, very grave--
You could have just said something.
Honestly, I've always been interested in monster trucks.
You took him to monster trucks?
I thought it would be a change!
It was a change.
Look, we could've just left.
What and miss the nitro-burning funny cars? No, couldn't have that.
Okay, can we get back on the vampire tip here? These guys were here with a purpose.
Yes, yes, and we must ascertain what that purpose is.
Where's your friend?
I sent him home.
Oh, good. Yes, the less he's involved in all this, the safer he'll be.
He did bag a vamp his first time out.
Giles takes an open book from the top of a stack and reveals an old picture of Drusilla.
Gotta give him credit for... (notices the picture) that.
Something wrong?
Who's this?
She's called Drusilla, a sometime paramour of Spike's. She was killed by an angry mob in Prague.
Well, they don't make angry mobs like they used to, 'cause this girl's alive. I saw her with Angel.
With Angel?
Isn't he supposed to be a good guy?
Yeah. He is.
I think maybe we need to read up on this nice lady.
Well, some of my new volumes may be more helpful. My own research is--
Suddenly, the blonde vampire bursts from his office and collides with Giles. Jenny draws a startled breath and Buffy runs to Giles' aid, but is knocked to the floor underneath him when the vampire gives him a hard shove. The creature jumps up onto the table and leaps over the mezzanine railing, making her escape through the stacks. Jenny helps Giles and Buffy up.
Are you guys okay?
A book! It took one of my books!
Well, at least someone in this school is reading.
He said he killed it. That's the vampire Ford said he killed.
Drusilla is talking to her bird.
You sing the sweetest little song. Won't you sing for me, hmm? Don't you love me anymore?
The bird is lying dead at the bottom of the cage. SPIKE comes into the room behind Drusilla.
Darling! I heard a funny thing just now. Lucius tells me that you went out on a hunt the other night.
My tummy was growly and you were out. (to the bird) Come on. (whistles) I'll pout if you don't sing.
Spike wraps his arms around her.
You meet anyone? Anyone interesting? Like Angel?
Angel.
Yeah. So... what might you guys have talked about, then? Old times? Childhood pranks? It's a little off, you two so friendly, him being the enemy and all that.
I'll give you a seed if you sing.
The bird's dead, Dru. You left it in a cage and you didn't feed it and now it's all dead, just like the last one.
Drusilla cowers and whines.
Oh, I'm sorry baby. I'm a bad, rude man. I just don't like you goin' out, that's all. You are weak. Would you like a new bird? One that's not dead?
This is so cool!
Spike looks up to see Ford standing across the room.
I would totally live here.
Do I have anyone on watch here? It's called security, people. Are you all asleep? Or did we finally find a restaurant that delivers?
I know who you are.
Yeah, I know who I am, too. So what?
I came looking for you, Spike. You are Spike, right? William the Bloody?
You've got a real death wish. It's almost interesting.
The blonde vampire comes in, walks up to Spike and hands him the book she stole. Spike begins to leaf through it.
Oh, this is great. This'll be very useful. (to Ford) So, how did you find me?
That doesn't matter. I've got something to offer you. I'm pretty sure this is the part where you take out a watch and say I've got thirty seconds to convince you not to kill me? (smiles) It's traditional.
Spike slams the book shut and strides over to Ford.
Well, I don't go much for tradition.
He grabs Ford by the ear and lifts him.
Wait, love.
Ford is in obvious pain, but doesn't scream. Drusilla puts her hand on Spike's shoulder and he lets go.
Well?
Oh, c'mon! Say it! It's no fun if you don't say it.
What? Oh. You've got thirty seconds to convince me not to kill you.
Yes! See, this is the best! I want to be like you. A vampire.
I've known you for two minutes and I can't stand you. I don't really feature you livin' forever. (to Drusilla) Can I eat him now, love?
Drusilla shakes her head.
Well, feature this: I'm offering you a trade. You make me a vampire and I give you the Slayer.
Ford now has their undivided attention. Spike smiles.
Buffy is nursing a cup of coffee. Angel slowly pushes the door open.
Buffy. May I come in?
Sure. I thought once you were invited you could always just walk in.
I can. I was just being polite. We need to talk.
Do we?
It's about your friend Ford. He's not what he seems.
Who is these days?
Willow ran him down on the computer.
Willow?
We found this address, we checked it out with Xander, and it turned out--
And Xander? Wow. Everybody's in. It's like a great big exciting conspiracy.
What are you talking about?
I'm talking about the people I trust. Who's Drusilla?
Angel lowers his eyes, caught in a lie.
And don't lie to me. I'm tired of it.
Some lies are necessary.
For what?
Sometimes the truth is worse. You live long enough, you find that out.
I can take it. I can take the truth.
Do you love me?
What?
Do you?
She takes a moment to consider her answer.
I love you. I don't know if I trust you.
Maybe you shouldn't do either.
Maybe I'm the one who should decide!
I did a lot of unconscionable things when I became a vampire. Drusilla was the worst. She was... an obsession of mine. She was pure and sweet and chaste...
And you made her a vampire.
First I made her insane. Killed everybody she loved. Visited every mental torture on her I could devise. She eventually fled to a convent and on the day she took her Holy Orders, I turned her into a demon.
Well. I asked for the truth.
Ford's part of some society that reveres vampires. Practically worships them. I don't know what he wants from you but you can't trust him.
Buffy walks up the stairs to the quad. Ford meets her there. Circle pan as they talk.
Buffy!
Ford.
I had a great time last night. Well, an interesting time.
I'm glad.
Do you want to go out again tonight?
Not busy.
I sort of had an idea. It's a... it's a secret. Kinda want to surprise you.
I like surprises.
Can you meet me here?
Sure.
At nine?
At nine.
It's gonna be fun!
He walks off and Buffy just stands there for a moment before continuing on her way.
Xander and Willow are sitting on the steps. Buffy comes down behind them.
Buffy!
Buffy doesn't really want to face her, but does.
Did, uh, Angel--
He told me everything.
I'm sorry we kept stuff from you.
It's okay.
When Angel came to my room he was just really concerned for you and we didn't wanna say anything in case we were wrong.
Did you find out what Ford is up to?
I will.
She walks off and Willow and Xander sadly watch her go. After a moment something clicks in Xander's head.
Angel was in your bedroom?
Ours is a forbidden love.
Chanterelle is sitting and nervously drumming her fingers. Diego paces anxiously. Pan up to Ford coming down the stairs.
Chanterelle. Is everything ready?
Of course. It's ready. I took care of it. I always take care of it.
Is it time? Tonight?
Ford pours some wine.
You nervous?
Yes. No. I'm ready for the change. Do you really think they'll bless us?
I know they will.
He smiles at Chanterelle. She smiles back.
Everything's falling into place.
What about your friends? Are they coming?
What are you talking about?
Your friends. They came. Last night. Two guys and a girl.
One was mean.
Oh, Christ! Why didn't you tell me about this?
I have to do everything around here. Sorry, Mr. Flawless Plan Guy, it slipped my mind.
It's gonna be all right, isn't it?
Ford winces in pain and puts his fingertips to his forehead.
They're not going to let us down?
It's going to be fine.
I need them to bless me.
It's gonna be fine!
No.
All heads turn to Buffy at the top of the stairs.
It's really not.
It's kinda drafty in here.
I'm sorry, Ford. I just couldn't wait till tonight. I'm rash and impulsive. It's a flaw.
We all have flaws.
I'm still a little fuzzy on exactly what yours is. I think it has to do with being a lying scumbag.
Everybody lies.
What do you want, Ford? What's this all about?
I really don't think you'd understand.
I don't need to understand. I just need to know.
I'm going to be one of them.
You want to be a vampire?
I'm going to.
You know, vampires are a little picky about who they change ov-- (figures it out) You were going to offer them a trade!
I don't think I want to talk anymore.
She grabs him by the throat and shoves him up against a pillar.
Yeah, well, I still feel awfully chatty. You were going to give them me! Tonight!
Yes.
You had to know I'd figure it out.
Actually, I was counting on it.
She lets go of his throat and backs away. He coughs a bit and then laughs.
What's supposed to happen tonight?
This is so cool! It's just like it played in my head. You know that part where you ask me what's supposed to happen? (snickers) It's already happening.
Diego swings the inner door shut with a loud clang. She runs back up the stairs and pounds on it.
Rigged up special. Once it's closed, it can only be opened from the outside. As soon as the sun sets, they'll be coming.
Ford, if these people are still around when they get here--
We'll be changed. All of us.
We're going to ascend to a new level of consciousness! Become like them. Like the Lonely Ones.
This is the end, Buffy. No one gets out of here alive.
Buffy hurries back down the stairs.
There's gotta be another way out of here!
This is a bomb shelter, Buffy. I knew I wasn't going to be able to overpower you. But this is three feet of solid concrete. Trust me when I say we're in for the long haul.
At least let the other people go.
Why are you fighting this? It's what we want!
It's our chance for immortality.
This is a beautiful day. Can't you see that?
What I see is that right after the sun goes down, Spike and all of his friends are going to be pigging out at the all-you-can-eat moron bar.
Okay, that's it. I think we should gag her.
I think you should try.
She's an unbeliever. She taints us.
I am trying to save you! You are playing in some serious traffic here. Do you understand that? You're going to die! And the only hope you have of surviving this is to get out of this pit right now, and my god, could you have a dorkier outfit?
Diego steams but Chanterelle just smiles.
I gotta back her up, D. You look like a big ninny. (alarm goes off) 6:27, sunset.
They all walk away from her as she desperately looks around for what to do next.
Spike comes marching out with his troops.
When we get there, everybody spread out. Two men on the door, first priority's the Slayer, everything else is fair game and let's remember to share, people. (to Drusilla ) Are you sure you're up for this?
I want a treat. I need a treat.
And a special one you'll have. Lucius! Bring the car around.
Buffy runs back up the stairs to the door. Ford follows her.
Hey, you never give up, do you?
No, I don't.
That's a good quality in a person. Too many people, they just lay back and take it, but us...
Us? We have something in common now?
More than you think.
Yeah, well, let me explain something to you. You're what we call the bad guy.
I guess I am!
These people aren't going to get changed, are they? The rest of them, they're just fodder.
Technically, yes. But I'm in. I will become immortal.
Well, I've got a news flash for you, brain trust: that's not how it works. You die and a demon sets up shop in your old house and it walks and it talks and it remembers your life, but it's not you.
It's better than nothing.
And your life is nothing?
Ford snickers.
Ford, these people don't deserve to die!
Well, neither do I! But apparently no one took that into consideration, 'cause I'm still dying.
Buffy begins to realize what he's up to now.
I look good, don't I? Well, let me tell you something. (angry) I've got maybe six months left and by then what they bury won't even look like me. It'll be bald and shriveled and it'll smell bad. No, I'm not going out that way.
Buffy turns away.
I'm sorry, Summers. Did I screw up your righteous anger riff? Does the nest of tumors liquefying my brain kinda spoil the fun?
I'm sorry. I had no idea. But what you're doing is still very wrong.
Okay, well, you try vomiting for twenty-four hours straight because the pain in your head is so intense and then we'll discuss the concept of right and wrong. (points down) These people are sheep. They want to be vampires because they're lonely, miserable or bored. I don't have a choice.
You have a choice. You don't have a good choice but you have a choice! You're opting for mass murder here and nothing you say is going to make that okay!
You think I need to justify myself to you?
I think this is all part of your little fantasy drama! Isn't this exactly how you imagined it? You tell me how you've suffered and I feel sorry for you. Well, I do feel sorry for you and if those vampires come in here and start feeding, I'll kill you myself!
You know what, Summers? I really did miss you.
Buffy can only look at him as a car comes screeching to a halt outside.
Ford, help me stop this. (silence) Please!
Ford remains silent. Buffy runs around to the stairs again.
People, listen to me! This is not the mothership, people! This is ugly death come to play!
Ford backhands her across the face and she goes tumbling to the bottom of the steps. He comes down after her and punches her in the back as she tries to get up, sending her to the floor again. They hear the outside door open and look up.
Chanterelle starts up the stairs to meet them. Ford checks to see that Buffy is still out cold on the floor. Chanterelle reaches the top of the steps as the inner door opens. Spike walks up to her his vampire visage leering at her. He roars and she
flinches a bit but doesn't back down. He tears the choker off her neck. She starts to cry in fear.
Take them all. Save the Slayer for me.
The vampires run and jump down the stairs to the people below and begin feeding. Spike grabs Chanterelle by the neck and bites her violently.
Buffy wakes and stands up as Ford tries to hit her with a crowbar. She grabs his arm in mid-swing and pulls him around, sending him headfirst into a concrete pillar. He falls unconscious to the floor. She looks at the mayhem going on around her and spots Drusilla standing by herself on the balcony. She takes a running leap off of a couch and springs up to the balcony railing, quickly climbing over. She seizes Drusilla from behind and holds a stake to her chest.
Spike!
Spike stops feeding on Chanterelle and looks over at them. Drusilla stares in fear at the stake poised in front of her.
Everybody stop!
They all stop feeding.
Good idea. Now you let everyone out or your girlfriend fits in an ashtray.
Spike?
It's gonna be all right, baby. (to the others) Let them go!
The vampires let go of their victims and the stunned vampire wanna-bes hurry up the stairs and out of the club.
Down the stairs.
Spike slowly backs down the stairs. Buffy forces Drusilla ahead of her, still holding the stake ready. When Buffy reaches the top of the stairs, she stares at Spike for a moment. She looks at Drusilla and shoves her down the stairs at Spike.
He catches and steadies her as Buffy turns and rushes out the door. He starts to give chase as Buffy swings the door shut behind her. Spike slams up against it and looks for a way to open it.
Where's the doorknob?
Buffy walks out of the building among the shaken club goers. Angel walks up to her and Willow and Xander are close behind.
You guys are just in time.
Are there vampires?
They're contained. They'll get out eventually, though. We should probably go. We can come back when they're gone.
Come back for what?
Buffy looks back at the entrance.
For the body.
The vampires are banging on the doors. Ford stirs and stands up, holding his head. Spike is comforting Drusilla.
What happened?
We're stuck in a basement.
Buffy?
She's not stuck in the basement.
Hey, well, I delivered. I handed her to you.
Yes, I suppose you did.
So? What about my reward?
Spike and Ford stare at each other.
Buffy enters and finds the door broken and twisted. She looks down below and sees Ford lying face down. She descends the stairs and tenderly touches his dead body.
Buffy has tears in her eyes as she lays a bouquet of red roses on Ford's grave. She stands up again and walks back to Giles.
I don't know what I'm supposed to say.
You needn't say anything.
It'd be simpler if I could just hate him. I think he wanted me to. I think it made it easier for him to be the villain of the piece. Really he was just scared.
Yes, I suppose he was.
Nothing's ever simple anymore. I'm constantly trying to work it out. Who to love or hate. Who to trust. It's just like, the more I know, the more confused I get.
I believe that's called growing up.
I'd like to stop then, okay?
I know the feeling.
Does it ever get easy?
Ford rises from his grave, a snarling vampire just as he desired, and attacks Buffy. She plunges a stake into his heart with no more effort than swatting a fly. He steps back and looks at the stake protruding from his chest, then looks back up at her as he bursts into ashes.
You mean life?
Yeah. Does it get easy?
What do you want me to say?
Lie to me.
Yes, it's terribly simple. The good guys are always stalwart and true, the bad guys are easily distinguished by their pointy horns or black hats, and we always defeat them and save the day. No one ever dies and everybody lives happily ever after.
Liar.