[Transcript of "Buffy The Vampire Slayer" episode Earshot at buffyology.com.]
BUFFY runs, looking over her shoulder. She trips and falls just as two demons with horned ridges on their heads, stumpy tails and no visible mouths approach, chasing her. Buffy leaps up and kicks one in the back of the knee, then follows with a kick to the side of its head. Smiling, she squares off, a nasty looking knife in hand.
You demons can't resist a 'run and stumble', can you?
She tries to stab the first demon, but it knocks the knife from her hand into the claws of Demon #2. She slams Demon #1 into the swing-set, but it regains its footing and faces her. Demon #2 throws the knife back at Buffy. Catching the knife midair, Buffy seizes Demon #1, slams it onto a picnic table, and stabs it once through the heart. The second demon runs off.
One down, one gone...
CU on the demon's blood running off its chest and onto Buffy's hand. It's instantly absorbed into her skin, leaving no trace.
Opening credit sequence.
WILLOW and Buffy walk together.
So scabby demon got away?
Scabby demon number two got away... scabby demon number one, big check in the 'slay' column.
I don't like this whole 'no mouth' thing. It's disquieting.
Well, no mouths mean no teeth. (beat) Unless they have them somewhere else...
GILES, OZ and XANDER are already there, books spread out on the reading table.
Morning, girls. We've been researching the Mayor's forthcoming Ascension.
It's pretty riveting stuff.
What do we know?
What don't we know? Tell her Giles.
Based on the supposed date, Graduation Day, and the Mayor being impervious to harm, I've cross referenced--
He's a cross referencing fool.
And I've eliminated several possibilities. It's not the ritual flaying of the demon Azorath, nor the... (long beat) I don't know what's going to happen.
That was kind of an anti-climax.
We don't know anything? The whole Faith/Angel thing was for nothing?
No, no, if nothing else Angel's charade has brought Faith's treachery into the open. And this information about the Ascension will prove useful... eventually. I just need to put it together.
WESLEY makes his way noisily through the doors and strides purposefully up to the table.
Terribly sorry, I was detained. Official Council business. Mr. Giles, you were speaking?
I was just filling Buffy in on my progress regarding the research of the Ascension.
Oh... and what took up the rest of the minute?
TouchÈ. Of course, my work is unofficial. I am sure, however, with the resources of the Council at your disposal, you will have something to add?
Well, I am pleased to state, with certainty, that the demon Azorath will not in any way be--
Everyone except for Giles stands up and immediately leaves the library.
--involved in the... I'm sure we'll find out more soon.
The demon Azorath?
Willow grills Buffy on the outcome of their recent intelligence operation.
So, have you talked to Angel lately?
Not really. Seeing him bad, even pretend bad, and with Faith...
He only kissed her for the greater good.
I don't know. To the naked eye, it looked like fun. Or maybe it wasn't... maybe he wasn't even tempted. I just wish I could be sure.
As always, I advise you to ask.
Like he'd tell me?
HOGAN, the school's basketball champion, and PERCY make their way down the hallway toward the group, laughing and giving high-fives the whole way.
Hogan! Great game, man!
Thanks.
Hogan Martin thinks he's so hot. Like we should all be awed by him 'cause he put a ball in a net.
Hey, Xander.
He said my name... he knows my name!
Hey, Willow!
Hi.
Look... I can't make the study session after school today. Can we do it fifth period?
Okay. Did you finish the reading?
Most of it.
Percy...
I'll finish it at lunch.
That's my little trooper!
I don't know what you're doing to him. I actually heard him complete a sentence. Had a clause and everything!
You're going to watch the game, right?
Wouldn't miss it!
See ya, Hogan! (to the girls) Ladies.
Xander heads off in search of class.
You're going to the game? I didn't know you liked basketball.
I didn't either, but I've really started getting into it. Especially now that we're in the championships, it's so exciting. Too bad you're patrolling, 'cause we're all going. Oz, Xander, everybody.
Willow heads into a classroom, leaving Buffy standing there alone.
Great. Everybody who isn't currently Buffy.
Giles is busy researching and Buffy is examining her hand under a lighted magnifying glass mounted to the desk.
You touched one of the demons?
A good touch, not a bad touch. Anyway, it's been itching like crazy. No big. Just another problem for the good people at Lubriderm, right?
Giles sets a large weathered book down in front of Buffy and points to a picture of one the demons Buffy fought the previous night.
Is this the demon in question?
In the disgusting flesh.
Hmmm.
What?
It says they can infect the host...
Infect? Infect!
Giles continues to read silently, oblivious to Buffy's panic.
Giles!
Hmm?
Infect!!
Oh, infect the host with an "aspect of the demon". That's all it says.
An aspect of the demon?
It is rather terse, isn't it?
You mean like a part of it?
There could be any number of explanations for your hand. A new fabric softener can cause irritation. In any case, I would advise to not to attempt to track the one that got away. Let's minimize your exposure.
A part of the demon... I hope it's not the outside part.
The students are assembled for a basketball pep rally. The cheerleaders are strutting their stuff on stage, led by CORDELIA. They introduce the team one by one, each with his own cheer.
H-O-G-A-N! It's Hogan! Goooo Hogan!
Is it me or is this really lame?
I don't know. I usually enjoy lameness and this is leaving me kinda cold.
Well, according to Freddy's latest editorial, (reading) "The pep rally is a place for pseudo-prostitutes to provoke men into a sexual frenzy, which when thwarted, results in pointless athletic competition."
And the downside being?
The school paper is edging on depressing lately. Have you guys noticed that?
I don't know. I always go straight to the obits.
Buffy is surreptitiously feeling her head.
What are you doing, Buffy?
She looks embarrassed and says nothing for a moment, then gives up the pretense.
Nothing! (ashamed) Checking for horns!
You know, Buffy, I don't even think Giles is right about you becoming like a demon. I mean, he's totally burnt, y'know? Dealing with Faith and this Ascension thing... between you and me, he's not doing his best work.
What if he is right? I'm suddenly going to grow this demon part and we don't even know what it is. It could be claws or scales or...(off Willow's look) What?
What if it's a boy demon?
T-O-M! It's Tom! Goooooo Tom!
They really are very good.
Their spelling's improved.
You know Oz, I look at all this beauty, all these healthy young women, and I wonder why I ever wasted my time on Cordelia. I mean look at her, she's no better looking than the rest of 'em.
Well, none of them are my--
Wesley walks up the stairs near the stage and glances in Cordelia's direction.
Oh, my god! He's looking at her! He's got his filthy, adult, Pierce Brosnany eyes all over my Cordy!
You're a very complex man, aren't you?
It's just, I'm scared, Will. There's this thing in me and... I can't find it, I can't stop it. What if it changes me? I mean, not just the way I look. All of a sudden I could be something that's not me anymore.
Willow shouts out a cheer, cutting Buffy off midstream.
Sorry, they spelled 'Percy' and I have to show support... he's needy. But I heard what you were saying, really! And I would be frightened too, but I'm sure you're going to be okay.
Buffy is patrolling on her own, looking rather forlorn. She stops, pulls out a compact and examines her face in the small mirror. We see her face reflected in the mirror.
Still got a mouth.
She closes the compact and turns around, startled to see ANGEL standing behind her.
Sorry.
That's okay. I didn't see you, so I should have known you were there. What are you doing here?
It's a dangerous time. You know... with Faith.
Yeah, Faith. She... well, Faith... what can you say about her?
I just wanted to make sure that you're, y'know, okay. That you're safe.
Well, the fact that you're right here... does that mean Faith's around? Are you keeping me safe by tracking me or are you tracking her?
I'm tracking you. Something's bothering you.
A lot of things, the most recent being this demon. Actually, two. I touched one of them and now I'm going to get a big case of the bumpies or a tail or something.
"Aspect of the demon".
You know the drill.
By rumor. But that doesn't mean anything. I mean, sometimes demons, they just exaggerate their power.
Demon hype. Maybe not. I spend all my time in the dark here anyway. Its not like I'd be at a game, you know, with my friends, where someone could see me and my new monster part.
Hey, I won't let anything happen to you if I can help it. No matter what, I'll always be with you. Hey, I'll love you even if you're covered with slime.
I liked everything until that part.
Willow, Oz and Xander are sitting around discussing last night's basketball game. From this point forward, all dialogue in [brackets] indicates the character's audible thoughts (v.o.), not spoken words.
Could you believe it? Right at the buzzer! Three points for the win!
It was intense.
Yeah, for a minute there, I thought you were going to make an expression.
I felt one coming on, I won't lie.
Man, I've never seen anyone jump like Hogan Martin. They should call him "The Jumper"!
Or a name that isn't an article of women's clothing. Hey, remember when the--
Shhhhh!
Buffy walks into the lounge area and everyone falls silent.
Hmmm. Quietness. We either lost or we won and you don't want me to feel bad.
Yeah, it wasn't really a good game.
Yeah, tall hoops, but then tall guys. What's the point, huh?
Pretty dull.
Cordelia overhears their conversation and walks over.
Are you guys crazy? It was an incredible game! I've never cheered so hard in my life! I still have knee-marks on my back. (off their looks) From the pyramid?
Disgusted, she heads off to rejoin her cooler friends.
Yeah, well, I still bet patrolling was way better 'cause-- wow!-- important.
Well, I thought I saw a four-legged demon but it was just a dog.
A were-dog?
Regular.
Tough luck.
Xander's eyes wander from the conversation and land on Cordelia across the room, talking to her friends. He watches her sadly.
[I wonder if she and Wesley have kissed?]
It really bugs you, huh?
What?
Cordelia and Wesley... smooching.
Xander is taken aback but just assumes she made a lucky guess.
Man, you read my mind.
With a jolt, Buffy suddenly realizes that Xander didn't speak aloud and that she may in fact have done just that.
The next day. Buffy walks in through one of the outside doors, looking slightly dazed and bumps into MR. BEACH, a white haired, mild-mannered-looking teacher.
Whoa there, watch where you're going now.
I'm sorry Mr. Beach, I will.
[Students! If we could just get rid of all the students...]
The hallway is full of the typical morning bustle, crowded, with lots of students rushing about. Buffy begins to realize, as she walks, that she is able to hear the thoughts of everyone she passes.
[When I'm a software jillionaire and you're all flipping burgers, who's the loser then?]
[Maybe I'll take French, I said. How hard can it be? French babies learn it. Idiot!]
She passes by another student wearing pants so baggy the crotch sags to his knees.
[I swear, someday my pants are going to fall right off...]
[Buffy's so beautiful. I mean, look at that body...]
Buffy stops in front of the guy, enjoying the attention.
[God, I'd love to shove her against that locker right now and just... ooh!]
Now she's creeped-out by his attention, and she hurries away.
Buffy is consulting with Giles about her new-found ability.
Is this the thing? The aspect thing? 'Cause I gotta say, if it is, it is way better than a tail. I mean, I have a hard enough time as it is finding jeans that fit right.
Buffy, slow down. I'm not even convinced this is genuine mind- reading. You're most likely projecting your--
When I walked in a few minutes ago, you thought, "Look at her shoes. If a fashion magazine told her to, she'd wear cats strapped to her feet."
[The demons are telepathic! I should have known. That's why they don't need mouths.] Of course, the demons are telepathic--
I know. You just told me. That's why they don't need mouths. And you should have known.
Giles regards Buffy, dumbstruck.
This is astounding!
It was happening out in the hallway. Principal Snyder has Walk Like an Egyptian stuck in his head. And the boys of this school are seriously disturbed. It's weird, but Giles, think about it. I mean, think about what I can do.
Well it could be very useful. You could anticipate your opponent's every move, turn his plans against him.
Oh, way better than that!
Buffy is enjoying her new talent at the expense of NANCY, the class know-it-all. Willow, Xander and the class loner, FREDDY sit nearby. The teacher, MS. MURRAY, is discussing Shakespeare's Othello with the class.
Jealousy.
Buffy, right... very good.
[I knew that!]
Jealousy clearly is the tool that Iago uses to undo Othello. But what's his motivation, what reason does Iago give for destroying his superior officer? [Cassio has my place, betwixt my sheets he's done my office.]
Well, he was passed over for promotion. Cassio was picked instead. And people were saying that Othello slept with his wife.
[Buffy did the reading? Buffy understood the reading?]
[When did she study? Was I supposed to study? Ms. Murray's kinda hot...]
[I was going to say Cassio. I hate her!]
Any other reason?
Race!
Good, Nancy. Can't overlook that.
[Look at them scrambling for the teacher's praise like pigeons for old bread crusts.]
Will, who's that guy?
That's Freddy Iverson. He writes those editorials for the school paper. He's sardonic.
[Bread crusts... that's deep. I should write that down.]
Is there something else at work here?
Well, he sort of admits himself that his motives are... spurious? He does things because he enjoys them. It's like, he's not... he's not really a person. He's the dark half of Othello himself.
The students gape in awe.
Buffy... really very astute. I said something quite like that in my dissertation.
I know. I mean, I agree with that.
Yes, and doesn't that also explain Othello's readiness to believe Iago? Within seconds he turns on Desdemona. He believes she's been unfaithful. And we're all like that. We all have our little internal Iagos that tell us our husbands or our girlfriends or whatever don't really love us. We can never really see what's in someone's heart.
It's daylight and thick curtains cover the doors and windows. Angel is standing by the door when Buffy suddenly lifts the curtain and walks inside, making him jump to avoid the light.
Oh, sorry! Sorry about the daytime. I just ducked out of school and that's when they have it. (beat) You look good. I mean, I know I saw you last night, but sometimes things can change real quick. I mean, really quickly. Listen to me, I'm talking like Faith.
Buffy is obviously trying to spark a reaction in Angel, hoping to use her new telepathy to catch his true feelings regarding Faith.
You know, not that she was so bad to have around, y'know, before the evil. No, I think she was hurting a lot and some people-- protective-type people-- might be drawn to that, I guess. Well, the thing about Faith--
You can't get into my mind.
How did you-- why not?
It's like the mirror... the thoughts are there, but they create no reflection in you. (beat) You got your aspect of the demon.
Yeah. Giles doesn't know how long its going to last. It's okay. A little headachy, but--
You don't have to play games with me, Buffy. Ever.
Well, you're not exactly Joe-Here's-What-I'm-Thinkin'.
So ask me.
Oh, but that would have made sense.
What do you want to know about? Faith? How I felt kissing her? Pretending to have no soul? Watching you suffer?
Well, since you bring it up...
I hated hurting you. More than I can stand.
Look, the thing about Faith... I'd understand, y'know. She has that whole "bad girl" thing working for her.
Kissing her meant nothing. I don't want a bad girl. I've done that before.
Angel pauses to choose his words carefully.
I've lived a long time, Buffy and I'm past that. I've been with dozens of girls like her. More.
Oh, this honesty stuff is fun.
And there's no comparison. In 243 years, I've loved exactly one person.
Her heart swells at his words.
Oh... (beat) It is me, right?
Next time, just ask.
Okay.
And Buffy, be careful with this gift. A lot of things that seem strong and good and powerful... they can be painful.
Like say... immortality?
Exactly. I'm dying to get rid of that.
Funny.
I'm a funny guy.
The gang is assembled for a briefing on Buffy's condition.
She can read our minds? Our every impulse and fantasy?
Every one.
[Oh, god!]
[I don't see what this has to do with me.] I don't see what this has to do with me.
Well, I think its great, right? I mean, you enjoy your other Slayer powers.
Yeah, it'll be fun. And did you see Nancy Doyle's face in English class today?
Yeah, she's super competitive. [She's hardly even human anymore. How can I be her friend now? She doesn't need me!]
No, I do need you!
Okay, what are you talking about? 'Cause you are so creepy right now.
I think there must be some precedent for occurrences such as this. I'll research it. Wesley, can you give me a hand?
Of course. Where do you think we should start?
[I am my thoughts. If they exist in her, Buffy contains everything that is me and she becomes me. I cease to exist. Hmmm.]
[What am I going to do? I think about sex all the time! Sex. Help! Four times five is thirty... five times six is thirty-two. Naked girls. Naked women. Naked Buffy. Oh, stop me!]
God, Xander, is that all you think about?
Actually? Bye!
He jumps up and sprints from the library.
Xander has just illustrated something. Chances are, you're all going to be thinking whatever you least want Buffy to hear. It's a question, of course, of mental discipline.
He's right.
[Look at Cordelia... no, don't look at Cordelia! She's a student. Oh, I am bad. I'm a bad, bad man.]
He notices Buffy looking at him and smiling.
Excuse me.
Like Xander, he beats a hasty retreat into Giles' office.
What's it like Buffy?
I don't know. I mean, its a little weird but look, please don't for a second think I don't need you, because I do. I want to share this with you. Its like... all these doors are opening to all these little worlds and I can just walk inside.
[No one else exists either. Buffy is all of us. We think, therefore she is.]
[She knows so much. She knows what Oz is thinking! I never know that. Before long, she'll know him better than I do.]
No, don't think that.
I can't help it, Buffy. I'm sorry, I just can't.
She gathers her things and rushes out of library.
If you don't need me, I'm gonna follow the redhead.
Guess I won't be writing that book, "Winning Friends Through Telepathy".
[Whatever. I wonder when I can go.] Whatever. Can I go?
Wesley emerges briefly from Giles' office, leaning out only as much as he needs to.
Excuse me, can you hear me thinking in here? I could go out into the hall...
Buffy feels totally isolated from everyone, even her closest friends.
You know what? You stay. I'm getting a headache. I'll go.
The halls are crowded as usual and Buffy is having difficulty shutting out all of the voices in her head. It's a constant din, one thought barely finishing before the next is pushing into her mind. The rising cacophony is becoming physically painful for her.
[She is so hot.] [I hate my body.] [I could scream from boredom.]
[No one is ever going to love me.] [What if I never get breasts?] [I can't believe the test is today.] [I have the worst...] [Get rid of the students. It's so easy...] [He has the cutest butt!]
Nancy walks past Buffy.
[I hate her.]
Giles is pouring over a musty, leather-bound volume. Wesley hovers nearby, also going through a book.
Here, it's happened before. A man in Ecuador. Quite recently.
Can we contact him?
I'd say not. He can't communicate with anyone.
Dead?
No, he's in complete isolation. The power... you can't shut it off.
Buffy is standing in the lunch line, just staring into space as more and more thoughts assault her senses. The LUNCH LADY eyes her strangely as she ladles a scoop of potatoes onto Buffy's plate. Buffy is frozen, just standing there looking back and forth, trying to sort through the noise.
[It's gotta get better. Please tell me it gets better.]
[I hate school.]
[I never should have taken honors math. I'm' too stupid.]
[Am I normal?]
JONATHAN is standing in the line behind her, watching her freak out.
Are you... through with the mashed potatoes?
Surprised, Buffy snaps out of her reverie for a moment, but then just stares at him.
[She doesn't even know I'm here.]
But it's not that she's ignoring him. She can barely perceive him over all the jumbled minutiae of her classmates' consciousness competing for space in her mind.
[I'll never get my driver's license.]
[I want a car sooo bad.]
[Come on... Come on...]
[What did Mrs. Kelley say?]
[Didn't she wear that skirt yesterday?]
[Oh, my god, his fly is down!]
[If I stand in just the right place, I can see in the arm hole...]
[The test is today!]
The thoughts come faster and faster. Buffy is completely disoriented, staggering through the cafeteria with her lunch tray. Suddenly, the din goes silent, and one powerfully clear thought emerges like a clarion, dripping with menace.
[This time tomorrow, I'll kill you all.]
Stunned, Buffy stands in the middle of the cafeteria, searching for the source while the students buzz around her.
Buffy stands silently, unmoving, in the middle of the cafeteria. Suddenly, her lunch tray slips from her fingers and clatters onto the floor, prompting dozens of students around her to clap, point and laugh. Their thoughts come again like a wave, washing over her. Buffy begins running up to students, blindly grabbing them, hoping to find the "killer", but only receiving confused looks and more jumbled thoughts.
Buffy grabs Jonathan by the shoulders and stares at him for a moment before rushing to the next student.
[She touched me!]
More and more thoughts assault her brain. Buffy grabs her head, spinning wildly, hoping to stop them.
As they become too much for her to handle, Buffy slumps to the floor, unconscious.
Buffy's POV: Giles, Willow, Xander, Oz and Cordelia hovering over her, relieved she's awake. Buffy is lying on the ground.
[I think she's waking up!]
[She's okay.]
[Oh, thank god.]
[Her eyes are opening.]
[I'm cold.]
You all right?
I told them not to move you. They probably severed your spinal cord.
She struggles to sit up.
I'm okay.
Buffy!
No really, I'm okay. Listen, there's a killer in the cafeteria.
See, I've been saying for years that the lunch lady's going to do us all in with that mulligan stew.
Cordelia punches him in the arm.
Xander!
I mean, what the hell is a mulligan?
Someone was thinking it. They thought "this time tomorrow, I'll kill you all". I have to find them.
She attempts to stand but doesn't have the strength.
Did you recognize a voice?
No.
Boy or girl?
I don't know. I mean, it was hardly human, it was so full of anger and pain.
She finally manages to stand and hesitantly walks toward the school. But she's instantly overwhelmed by a crushing wave of thoughts and stumbles backwards.
You can't.
No, I have to find them.
Are you sure they meant it?
Yeah, I mean, who hasn't just idly thought about takin' out the whole place with a semi-automatic? (off everyone's look) I said idly!
I know the difference. He... she... whoever, they meant it. They're going to do it.
[She looks so tired...]
[How horrible.]
[I'm not getting any warmer.]
[I bet it was Hogan.]
[Who could it be?]
Shut up! (beat) I'm sorry. Could you guys not think so loud... or so much?
Buffy you should go home. I'll take you home.
Yeah, okay. No! I need you guys to go back to the cafeteria. Make a list of everyone who's there. We have to find the killer before lunch tomorrow.
We'll do it, Buffy... a list of all the students.
Yeah, Nancy was there. She's scary, and... oh, teachers too. Mr. Beach-- he thought something about getting rid of all the students.
Giles guides her toward his car.
Come on.
I can't shut it out, Giles. It's like this invasion of my head. It's like there's these strangers walking around in there. Look at this. I can't even be around people any more. Not that they're really clamoring to be near me anyway... even you.
I'm sorry, Buffy. It's hard for all of us but Wesley and I are looking for a way to help.
But I'll be okay, right? I mean, even if you can't get rid of it?
You'll be fine. I promise.
Giles walks on ahead of her.
[If it doesn't go away, she'll go insane.]
Buffy stops and stares at him, realizing the truth.
Willow is compiling the results of their cafeteria census.
I think we have everyone that was in the cafeteria. I'll do some computer work, match it against the FBI mass-murderer profiles, see if maybe we can rule some people out.
I'm still having trouble with that fact that one of us is just going to gun everybody down for no reason.
Yeah, because that never happens in American high schools.
It's bordering on trendy at this point.
Besides which, Sunnydale High? Center of Evil and all that? Let's get to work. We have till lunchtime tomorrow. We hope.
Buffy is in bed, trying to rest. JOYCE walks in to check on her. Buffy smiles weakly.
There, you look better already.
Thanks, mom.
Joyce doesn't want to stay any longer than she has to.
I'm just going to get you another pillow.
I really don't need one.
But you need another blanket.
Mom, I'm fine!
How about some soup? Chicken and stars?
Mom, please... just come sit with me.
Joyce looks very uncomfortable, wanting desperately to leave.
I've... I've got laundry...
Why are you...
Buffy is baffled by her mother's behavior but suddenly a light dawns and she sits bolt upright in bed.
You had sex with Giles?
Joyce nervously stutters, her worst fears coming to light.
You had sex with Giles!!
It was the candy... we were teenagers...
On the hood of a police car?
I'll be downstairs. You feel better.
Joyce rushes out the door as yet another revelation hits Buffy.
Twice?!
Willow wraps up her computer research.
Okay, I've taken our list and narrowed it down to a dozen strong suspects. Here are your personalized assignments.
Oh, I was hoping there'd be assignments.
I think I should work with Wesley.
You have no shame.
Oh, please. Like shame is something to be proud of?
Be quiet! Sorry, but this is important. Okay, talk to everyone on your list and use the sample questions. (no one moves) Today, people!
Everyone rushes out, cowed by Willow's sudden display of authority.
Oh, write neatly and label your worksheets!
Later, in the library. Willow is standing behind Jonathan, giving him the third degree.
Fantasies are fun, aren't they Jonathan?
I guess...
We all have fantasies where we're powerful and respected, where people pay attention to us.
Maybe.
But sometimes the fantasy isn't enough, is it Jonathan? Sometimes we have to make it so people don't ignore us... make them pay attention. You know what I'm talking about, don't you?
You want me to pay attention?
Oz interviews Hogan while he shoots free throws.
This is for the yearbook?
Yeah, personality profiles.
Can you ask it again?
Sure. (reading) "Do you ever feel that you've created a false persona for yourself, the 'guy who does everything right', and how much of a strain does it put on you to maintain it?"
Huh. I guess 'moderate strain'? Is that a good answer? I want to get this right.
Oz realizes the futility of trying to speak to Hogan on anything other than jock- level and gives up.
Yeah, that's good.
Cordelia walks in as Mr. Beach is cleaning the blackboards.
Hi, Mr. Beach. Are you planning on killing a bunch of people tomorrow?
He looks at her, dumbstruck.
Oh, its for the yearbook.
Xander interviews three attractive girls, taking extensive notes.
Okay, so turn off's include smoking, insensitive men and Birkenstocks. Okay, your idea of the perfect romantic evening. Candy, lets start with you...
Oz pops into the office, looking around.
Freddy?
The room appears empty and Oz leaves. Pan down to reveal Freddy cowering under his desk, obviously hiding from Oz.
Buffy stares out her bedroom window as the thoughts of her neighbors begin to seep into her consciousness.
[I should have just quit.]
[Look at him smiling, like he thinks I don't know about her?]
[I can't wait to tell him we're going to have a baby!]
[I'm so happy.]
[She doesn't know a thing.]
[I can't believe I'm getting married.]
[One more drink... that'll do it.]
Buffy slams the window shut but the thoughts keep coming.
[Twenty years...]
[It's just a little drink.]
[Wait till the next time he comes home smelling like...]
[Sometimes it's hard to keep going.]
Buffy slumps onto her bed, covering her head with a pillow.
Giles pores over a thick tome and Wesley is grinding something with a pestle and mortar.
Well, it seems to be coming along all right.
Yes, Buffy's being driven mad, we have no proof that this is going to work, and we still need the heart of the second demon, which we have no idea how to get without the Slayer.
Negative thinking doesn't solve problems.
Who is going to get the demon heart?
Ignoring Giles, Wesley gets up and goes into the office.
Berk.
The mouthless demon flies through the air and smashes into a picnic table, shattering it. Angel is close behind, fangs glistening, yellow eyes glowing. They fight furiously for several minutes before the demon seizes an opportunity and takes off running.
Buffy lies in bed, writhing in pain. Joyce wakes up in the chair next to Buffy's bed where she has spent the night, watching over her troubled daughter.
Willow interviews Nancy.
Do I often imagine classmates are spying on me? Or otherwise acting suspiciously?
Right.
Not till just now.
LARRY and Xander sit at a table in the lounge.
What? Talk louder, dude.
I'm just saying, it's gotta be frustrating, having this secret. You gotta be kinda filling up with resentment-- unexpressed rage-- just waiting to burst out. Today at lunch?
What secret? (loud) Being gay?
Xander looks around, totally freaked.
Man, I'm out! I'm so out I've got my grandma fixing me up with guys.
That's nice.
But it sounds like you're having a rough time with it. Look, just do it. (Freddy passes by) That weird Freddy Iverson guy, that does the school paper?
He's gay?
No, dude, but I bet he'd put in like a coming out announcement for you. Something tasteful.
Xander, for once, is speechless.
Oz approaches the closed door of the office and knocks.
Freddy?
Getting no response, Oz walks off. Pan to the side and we see Freddy hiding around the corner.
The group has gathered to compare notes.
He's the only one we couldn't find?
Yeah, Freddy Iverson.
The newspaper guy? But we can't figure out it's him without the worksheet, right?
Well, we do have this, people. (reading) Today's editorial, titled "Big game draws mindless, brain-dead mob."
Does he mention the cheerleaders? Because we were on!
Joyce and Giles look on as Buffy writhes in pain.
I can't stand this... I keep wondering if I'm hurting her with my thoughts.
You're not. Not anymore. She can't pick one thought out of the... out of the din.
A loud, insistent pounding comes from the front door and Joyce and Giles go downstairs to investigate.
Wesley, already there, opens the door and Angel runs in, covered by a blanket and trailing smoke. He carries a flask filled with glowing white ichor.
I got it.
Angel enters, setting the flask on Buffy's nightstand.
No... no...
I'm going to help you.
He cradles her head in his hand and forces her to drink the "demon's heart" liquid.
She chokes for a moment, but then calms down. He lays her back down and kisses her forehead softly. Suddenly, Buffy begins to thrash about violently, screaming. Angel attempts to hold her down.
Giles!
The gang walks through the courtyard, looking for Freddy Iverson. Xander points and they head off in that direction.
Jonathan is in the clock tower. He looks down at his feet, his face pale and sweating. As he bends down, we see a metallic case of some sort. Jonathan opens the case to reveal an unassembled, high-powered hunting rifle.
Buffy is still unconscious. Angel is at her side, holding her hand, and Giles, Wesley and Joyce stand close by behind him. Suddenly, Buffy opens her eyes.
Angel...
Thank god. Are you all right? Do you hear thoughts?
No... did you find the killer?
Freddy is seated behind his desk. Oz, Willow and Cordelia stride in the main door. Freddy tries to slip out the side door but Xander steps through, blocking his exit.
Okay, Oz. You got me. What are your friends going to do, hold me down?
You better believe it buster! You can't threaten a big murder without getting us pretty darn ticked!
Murder? What murder? You're not here about the review?
The review?
Freddy hands Oz a copy of the school paper.
Yeah, last Thursday?
"Dingoes Ate My Baby played their instruments as if they had plump polish sausages taped to their fingers."
Sorry, man.
Nah, it's fair.
I just get a lot of hate mail, and I thought you were going to come and deliver some personally.
Hey, if you find any 'tasteful' announcement about me from Larry--
Xander, we have to figure this out.
We have no shot. The killer could be anyone. We lose.
We still have a few minutes.
They all turn to see her standing in the doorway.
Buffy!
You're okay! (beat) Can you hear thoughts?
Buffy shakes her head 'no'.
Just when I wasn't thinking about sex!
Okay, here's the new plan. We're going to get Snyder to evacuate the school and just hope the killer's not waiting outside--
Cordelia has found a letter on Freddy's desk and begins reading it out loud.
"By this time tomorrow you'll all know what I have done. I'm sure you understand that I had to do it and that although death is never easy, its the only way." God! Doesn't anyone write in to praise the cheerleaders? We are so unsung!
Willow snatches the letter from Cordelia.
Jonathan! I had him in my grasp... slippery weasel!
Split up. Find him!
They all head off in different directions.
Jonathan snaps the rifle stock into place.
Oz runs in, looks around briefly, then leaves.
Jonathan slides the bolt action into place.
Willow runs into the library, looking around frantically.
Jonathan? Are you in here?
Jonathan picks up the barrel of the rifle.
Xander runs through the doors.
Jonathan? Jonathan!
Something catches his attention and he moves to investigate.
Oh, Jell-O.
Jonathan is attaching the barrel to the rest of the assembled rifle.
Cordelia strolls in. She approaches a student, grabs him and spins him around. She drops him, moves to another student and turns him around to face her, then she walks out in disgust.
Jonathan snaps the barrel into place with a loud click.
Buffy runs out into the courtyard. Shading her eyes, she looks around but doesn't see anything.
A metallic glint catches her eye and she looks up toward the clock tower. She sees Jonathan's silhouette and the rifle barrel and dashes for the stairs, but rather than waste time making her way through the students, she jumps up onto the outside wall of the stair risers and races up the 45° incline at amazing speed.
Several students notice this amazing display, including Nancy who looks up from her books to watch.
When Buffy reaches the top, she executes a 10-foot vertical leap and catches the edge of the roof with her hands. She pulls herself up from a dead hang, swings her legs forward, kicks off the wall, and back-flips onto the roof.
Nancy seems unimpressed by this display of near super-human athletic ability.
I could have done that.
Jonathan takes out a cartridge and loads it, sliding the bolt home. As he contemplates his next move, Buffy comes crashing through one of the boarded up windows behind him. Jonathan spins to face her, leveling the rifle at her defensively.
Get away from me!
Okay, Jonathan, you want to point that somewhere else?
Don't you try and stop me.
No, no. No stopping... just here for the view. Hey, City Hall.
Jonathan threatens her with the gun.
Go away.
Never gonna happen.
You think I won't use this?
I don't know Jonathan, I just--
Stop... doing that!
Doing what?
Stop saying my name like we're friends. We're not friends! You all think I'm an idiot, a short idiot!
I don't. I don't think about you much at all. Nobody here really does. Bugs you, doesn't it? You have all this pain and all these feelings and nobody's really paying attention.
You think I just want attention?
No, I think you're up in the clock tower with a high-powered rifle because you want to blend in. Believe it or not Jonathan, I understand about the pain.
Oh, right. Because the burden of being beautiful and athletic... that's a crippler.
You know what? I was wrong. You are an idiot. My life happens to, on occasion, suck beyond the telling of it. Sometimes more than I can handle. And it's not just mine. Every single person down there is ignoring your pain because they're too busy with their own. The beautiful ones, the popular ones, the guys that pick on you. Everyone. If you could hear what they were feeling...
They move toward the window and look down on the students in the courtyard.
The loneliness, the confusion... it looks quiet down there. It's not. It's deafening. (beat, re: rifle) You know, I could have taken that by now.
I know.
I'd rather do it this way.
He hands her the rifle. She pulls the bolt out and ejects the cartridge.
I just wanted it to stop...
Yeah, well, mass murder? Not really doctor recommended for that kind of pain. Besides, prison? You know it's a lot like high school, only, instead of noogies--
What are you talking about?
Actions having consequences. You know, stuff like that.
Well, I wouldn't ever hurt anybody. I came up here to kill myself.
Shocked, Buffy realizes Jonathan is not the one they're looking for.
Xander is strolling quietly through the kitchen, looking for a snack. He spies a tray full of red Jell-O squares, grins happily, and raises one to his mouth. Before he bites into it, he notices the lunch lady pouring an economy-sized box of rat poison into the stew pot. He looks at her, she looks at him, both of them frozen for a brief moment. Then Xander bolts out of the kitchen. The lunch lady drops her poison, picks up a meat cleaver and gives chase.
Rat poison... rat poison! There's poison in the food!
Xander begins overturning tables and knocking food trays from the hands of the students. As he tries for the exit, he slips on some of the food spilled on the floor and falls flat on his back. The stocky lunch lady stands over him, bringing the cleaver down to strike.
As her arm descends, it's stopped short by Buffy.
Okay, let's calm down.
Vermin... you're all vermin! You come in here and you eat and you eat. Filth...
I don't see this being settled with logic.
Buffy slams the lunch lady's hand to the right, then to the left, sending the cleaver sliding across the floor. The lunch lady throws a punch but Buffy easily ducks. Buffy punches her twice in the face, then kicks her in the head, knocking her cold and sending her flying across the room. Xander gives Buffy an appreciative look.
The next day. Willow and Buffy are arriving at school.
So you're feeling better about Angel?
Well, we talked. And then he ripped out the heart of a demon and fed it to me and then we talked some more.
See? That's how it should work!
Giles joins them.
Morning.
Hi, Giles.
Hi. Oh, I should get to the yearbook office. I'm going to give them the murderer profiles. They're really a good read.
Bye.
See ya.
Willow heads off.
How are you?
Lovin' the quiet. Nobody in here but me.
Jonathan, how's he?
Pretty crappy. His parents are freaking, he got suspended and toting a piece to school, not exactly winning him a place with the "in" crowd. But I think he's dealing.
Well, it's good of you to check on him.
Well, its nice to be able to help someone in a non-slaying capacity. Except he's starting to get that look. You know, like he's going to ask me to prom?
Well, it'd probably be good for his self-esteem if you--
Oh, come on! What am I, Saint Buffy? He's like three feet tall!
I'm glad to see you've recovered from your psychic encounter more or less intact. Feel up to some training?
Sure. We can work out after school. You know, if you're not too busy having sex with my mother.
Buffy keeps going as Giles walks straight into a tree.