Dead Things

[Transcript of "Buffy The Vampire Slayer" episode Dead Things at buffyology.com.]

Prologue

INT. SPIKE'S CRYPT-- NIGHT

Pan across SPIKE's neatly made bed. A rhythmic thumping sound comes from elsewhere in the room, accompanied by BUFFY's passionate moans. The thumping becomes more insistent, urgent, now accompanied by the sounds of destruction. Buffy's cries peak as she climaxes. Reveal Buffy and Spike lying spent together on the floor, sandwiched between several Oriental rugs.

BUFFY

(panting)
We missed the bed again.

SPIKE

Lucky for the bed.

Buffy looks down at the rug covering her naked body.

BUFFY

Is this a new rug?

SPIKE

No. Just looks different when you're under it.

Buffy laughs, then looks around critically.

BUFFY

You know, this place is okay for a hole in the ground. You fixed it up.

SPIKE

Well, I ate a decorator once. Maybe something stuck.

BUFFY

I've been thinking about doing something to my room.

SPIKE

Yeah?

BUFFY

Yeah, I think the New Kids On The Block posters are starting to date me.

SPIKE

Well, if you want, I can...

Spike stops and looks at Buffy in surprise.

SPIKE

Are we having a conversation?

BUFFY

What? No! No. (beat) Maybe.

SPIKE

Hmm.

BUFFY

What?

SPIKE

Well, isn't this usually the part where you kick me in the head and run out, virtue fluttering?

BUFFY

That's the plan... soon as my legs start working.

Spike grins and runs his finger up and down her arm.

SPIKE

You were amazing.

BUFFY

You got the job done yourself.

SPIKE

I was just trying to keep up. The things you do... the way you make it hurt in all the wrong places. I've never been with such an animal.

Buffy jerks her arm away.

BUFFY

I'm not an animal.

SPIKE

You want to see the bite marks?

BUFFY

You know, it's late. I should get home before Dawn goes to sleep.

Buffy starts looking around for her clothes under the rug. Spike sighs and lies back.

SPIKE

And she's off.

Buffy disappears completely beneath the rug.

BUFFY

(muffled)
Have you seen my underwear?

SPIKE

What is this to you-- this thing we have?

BUFFY

(muffled)
We don't have a thing. We have this. That's all.

She pulls herself up on her elbows.

SPIKE

Do you even like me?

BUFFY

(reluctant)
Sometimes.

SPIKE

But you like what I do to you?

Buffy won't look at him. After a moment Spike turns and reaches for something behind him. He holds up a pair of handcuffs.

SPIKE

Do you trust me?

BUFFY

Never.
CUT TO:

INT. NERD HIDEOUT-- NIGHT

JONATHAN and ANDREW unpack their things in their new hideout. Jonathan pulls a record album out of one of the boxes: Frampton Comes Alive!

Andrew grabs the record away from Jonathan.

ANDREW

How can I trust you not to touch my stuff? Actually living with supervillains was not part of the deal.

JONATHAN

We're on the lam, moron. It's not like we have a choice.

ANDREW

This sucks. Couldn't we have at least gotten a lair with a view?

JONATHAN

Stop whining! Get your sissy crap out of the way.

He shoves Andrew's box onto the floor.

ANDREW

Hey, quit it!

Andrew grabs for Jonathan but he points his magick voodoo bone at Andrew and starts waving it menacingly.

ANDREW

Don't you curse me!

Andrew takes it from him and holds it over his head.

JONATHAN

Hey, my bone!

Jonathan gut punches him.

ANDREW

Ow!

They grapple, hitting each other and grunting. WARREN looks over at the commotion and rolls his eyes.

WARREN

Hey! When you girls are done touching each other, the cerebral dampener's ready to be charged.

ANDREW

Cool.

He and Jonathan forget their fight and walk over to Warren's workbench where a golf-ball-sized silver sphere rests. Warren puts on a pair of red-tinted glasses and the other two follow suit.

JONATHAN

Got the thing?

Andrew takes out a plastic baggie.

ANDREW

Musk gland of a Homja-Maleev demon.

He opens the bag and they all recoil at the smell.

ANDREW

Fresh.

He coughs, takes it out of the bag and hands it to Jonathan.

JONATHAN

All right. Stand back.

He holds the musk gland in one hand, a vial in the other. He pops the vial's cap, then spits it at Andrew.

Jonathan sprinkles yellow powder from the vial onto the musk gland.

JONATHAN

Doma voluntatem, libera cupidinem, erumpe, ignem, excita.

Light suffuses the gland, then transforms it into a stream of light and smoke that shoots down into the silver ball. The sphere glows briefly, then returns to normal.

The magick leaves Jonathan's hand smoking slightly.

JONATHAN

Okay... ow!

Warren reaches over and grabs the silver ball.

WARREN

Gentlemen, the cerebral dampener... is online. And with this baby, we can make any woman we desire our willing sex slave. (beat) I know just where to start.

Opening credit sequence.

ACT I

INT. DOUBLEMEAT PALACE-- COUNTER-- DAY

Buffy and her morose co-worker GINA work the registers. Buffy hands a bag of burgers to a customer.

BUFFY

Doublemeat is double sweet. Enjoy!

CUSTOMER

Thank you.

The customer takes his meal and leaves. Gina gives Buffy a strange look.

BUFFY

(defensive)
Just something I'm trying.

She looks up as TARA approaches the counter.

TARA

Hey, sorry I'm late.

BUFFY

Oh, time has no meaning here. Gina, I'm taking a break.

Buffy takes her hat off and leads Tara to the employee lounge.

CUT TO:

INT. DOUBLEMEAT PALACE-- LOUNGE-- DAY

Tara looks dubiously at the posters adorning the wall: Dedication, Cooperation, Motivation and Productivity.

TARA

I have this sudden urge to dedicate my productive cooperation.

Buffy hands her a soda.

BUFFY

Well, if you close your eyes and repeatedly smash yourself in the head with frozen meat, it'll go away. Eventually. I'm hoping.

She fidgets nervously, rubbing her wrists.

BUFFY

Thanks for coming by.

TARA

Is it bad?

BUFFY

I was sort of hoping you could tell me.

TARA

I knew this was going to happen. What did Willow do now? Did she... she hurt anyone?

BUFFY

What? No, Tara, this isn't about Willow.

TARA

I thought that's why you didn't want to meet at the house.

BUFFY

Sorry, it's... Willow's fine. She's been doing really well. You'd be proud of her.

TARA

Good, that's... that's good. (beat) So what do you want to talk about?

BUFFY

It's Spike. He can hurt me. Without his head exploding.

TARA

Oh, my god. His chip stopped working?

BUFFY

No, it still works. Just not on me. I need to know about the spell.-- the one that brought me back. I'd ask Willow but...

TARA

You think it's you.

BUFFY

I don't know. I feel... different. There are things. I think maybe... I came back wrong.

TARA

(firm)
No, Buffy, that's not... No, you didn't.

BUFFY

Can you check out the spell? Just see if there's something that... could you just check? Please?
CUT TO:

EXT. SUNNYDALE STREETS-- NIGHT

The nerds' van is parked at the edge of an alley.

CUT TO:

INT. NERDS' VAN-- NIGHT

A video monitor shows nothing but snow. Suddenly it clears, revealing the inside of a bar.

JONATHAN

Right there! That's got it.

Jonathan and Andrew sit in front of the monitor wearing headsets.

JONATHAN

(into mike)
Mad Dog 2 to Mad Dog 1.

ANDREW

I thought I was Mad Dog 2.

Jonathan rolls his eyes.

JONATHAN

Mad Dog 3 to Mad Dog 1.
CUT TO:

INT. BAR & GRILL-- NIGHT

Warren stands by the door wearing a suit and tie.

JONATHAN

(over mike)
Signal's coming in strong and clear. Over.

Warren taps his earpiece.

WARREN

(into mike)
Roger that. Beginning preliminary sweep.

Warren looks around and adjusts his tie. A tiny camera is mounted in the center.

CUT TO:

INT. NERDS' VAN-- NIGHT

The view on the monitor shakes as Warren moves through the crowd.

CUT TO:

INT. BAR & GRILL-- NIGHT

The place is full of people, some in booths, some sitting at the bar, talking, drinking, laughing.

WARREN

(into mike)
Keep your potatoes peeled for the Slayer. I don't want any surprises.
CUT TO:

INT. NERDS' VAN-- NIGHT

ANDREW

We can really have anyone we want.

JONATHAN

It's like candy.

ANDREW

Juicy, pulsating candy.

JONATHAN

Oh! Oh, the one with the neck! Put the whammy on the neck!

ANDREW

No! The redhead! I want the redhead!
CUT TO:

INT. BAR & GRILL-- NIGHT

Warren watches as the redhead walks past him.

JONATHAN

(over mike)
The redhead's too tall.

ANDREW

(over mike)
So get a step ladder. No, no-- ow!

The sound of a fight erupts over the radio. Warren shakes his head and ignores them. He scans the crowd. Suddenly someone captures his attention.

Reveal KATRINA, Warren's ex-girlfriend, sitting at a table, drinking wine.

ANDREW

(over mike)
Get off of me!

JONATHAN

(over mike)
Take it back!

WARREN

(into mike)
Target acquired.
CUT TO:

INT. NERDS' VAN-- NIGHT

Jonathan has Andrew in a head-lock. They both freeze and look over at the monitor.

JONATHAN

What?
CUT TO:

INT. BAR & GRILL-- NIGHT

WARREN

(into mike)
Initiating contact.
CUT TO:

INT. NERDS' VAN-- NIGHT

Katrina appears on the screen as Warren moves toward her.

JONATHAN

The brunette?

ANDREW

Oh, she's kinda cute-- ow!

Jonathan tightens his hold on Andrew.

ANDREW

Oh, no! Go for the leather skirt!

As the girl in the leather skirt walks past Warren, her cleavage fills the screen.

ANDREW

Oh, bazoombas!
CUT TO:

INT. BAR & GRILL-- NIGHT

Warren checks out the girl's breasts as she moves past him.

ANDREW

(over mike)
Go for the one with the bazoombas!

JONATHAN

(over mike)
Yeah, go for the one with the bazoombas.

Warren ignores them and their chants of "bazoomba, bazoomba" and continues toward Katrina. He removes the earpiece and drops it into a martini glass as he passes one of the tables. It sizzles as it shorts out.

CUT TO:

INT. NERDS' VAN-- NIGHT

Andrew and Jonathan yelp as their headsets whine with feedback.

CUT TO:

INT. BAR & GRILL-- NIGHT

Warren slides into the chair beside Katrina, who doesn't notice him.

WARREN

So how did you get so beautiful?

Katrina laughs sarcastically as she turns to him.

KATRINA

Okay, does that line usually work--

When she sees Warren, she stops smiling.

KATRINA

What the hell are you doing here?

WARREN

It's nice to see you again too, Katrina.

KATRINA

Yeah, it's the seeing you part that's throwing me here, Warren, because I thought I was pretty clear with the never wanting that to happen again.

WARREN

Never's a long time, baby.

Warren holds up a folded bill between his fingers, gesturing to the bartender.

KATRINA

Apparently not long enough.

WARREN

Oh, you're not still sore about that thing, are you?

The bartender tries to refill Katrina's wine glass but she stops him.

KATRINA

What thing would that be exactly? The wind-up slut you tinkered together? Or when Little Miss Nuts and Bolts tried to choke me to death?

WARREN

Okay, so I've made a few mistakes.

KATRINA

No. No, I did. For ever lowering myself to be with a jerk like you.

She gets up. Warren stands too, stopping her.

WARREN

Don't say that.

KATRINA

Well, what did you expect? To just waltz in here and sweep me off my feet with your cheesy lines and fancy suit?

WARREN

No, I just... I just thought we could talk. I thought maybe we could work things out.

KATRINA

There's nothing to work out. What you did was sick and just looking at you makes me want to vomit.

She picks up her purse and turns to leave. Warren reaches into his pocket and slips on the protective glasses.

WARREN

You sure about that?

KATRINA

Yes-- god yes!-- I'm sure.

Warren takes out the cerebral dampener and opens his hand. The device flashes a red and yellow strobe into Katrina's face. She looks quizzically at Warren as he slips the device back into his coat pocket.

KATRINA

I love you, Master.

Warren grins and takes off his glasses.

WARREN

I love you, too, baby.
CUT TO:

INT. SUMMERS HOME-- LIVING ROOM-- NIGHT

Buffy enters in her Doublemeat uniform.

BUFFY

I'm home! Who wants to help scrape the grease off my...

She puts down her jacket and stares in shock at Xander and Dawn dancing together in the living room. Anya and Willow watch from the sofa.

BUFFY

(horrified)
Is there singing? Are we singing again?

XANDER

Nope, just the dancing.

ANYA

We're teaching Dawn perfectly synchronized dance steps for the wedding reception.

Xander whirls Dawn around, then into a dip. She giggles with delight.

XANDER

(to Buffy)
Want to go for a spin?

BUFFY

I think I'm heading more toward an ungainly collapse.

She sits between Anya and Willow.

WILLOW

Aww, rough day?

BUFFY

Kinda.

XANDER

You've been going at it too hard, Buffy. We hardly ever see you, what with slinging the Doublemeat and pounding the big evil.

ANYA

You are looking a little pounded. (off her look) Just around the eyes.

WILLOW

Hey, we're thinking of heading to the Bronze later. Want to come, get all unwindy?

XANDER

Tall glasses of frosty relaxation on me. Nectar of the working man.

BUFFY

No, thanks. I think I'll stay here with Dawn. Curl up on the couch with a big bowl of popcorn and--

A car horn honks outside and Dawn grabs her jacket and heads for the door.

BUFFY

--listen to the cars honk? (to Dawn) Where are you going?

DAWN

I'm sleeping over at Janice's?

BUFFY

And I'm falling for that again because of the surprise lobotomy?

WILLOW

It's okay, I checked it out. Janice's mom is picking her up.

BUFFY

Oh.

DAWN

I didn't think you'd care. You're never home so...

Buffy nods, accepting the rebuke.

BUFFY

I know. I'm sorry. But I'm here now. All visible and everything. Couldn't you just stay at Janice's another night?

DAWN

Her mom's cooking Mexican. She's going to teach me how to make real tortillas. Not like I knew you'd be around.

The horn honks again and Dawn grabs her stuff and leaves. Buffy turns to her friends with a brave smile.

BUFFY

Frosty nectar. Now please.
CUT TO:

INT. NERD HIDEOUT-- NIGHT

A champagne cork pops. Katrina, wearing a revealing French maid outfit, holds the bottle and fills Warren's glass. She tops off Andrew and Jonathan's glass as well.

WARREN

Thank you, baby.

KATRINA

My pleasure, Master.

ANDREW

That is so cool.

Katrina finishes filling Andrew's glass and steps back, staring straight ahead with a blank expression.

Jonathan looks at the cerebral dampener with awe.

JONATHAN

I really could've used one of these in high school.

WARREN

Gentlemen? To crime.

Warren raises his glass in a toast.

ANDREW/JONATHAN

Crime!

Andrew coughs and looks at his glass with a frown. Jonathan circles Katrina, checking her out.

ANDREW

Crime tastes funny.

JONATHAN

Wow. I still think I would have gone with the bazoombas but... wow.

ANDREW

Yeah, she's... really cute.

WARREN

(offended)
Cute? Look at her, man! The shape of her lips, the smooth, silky skin... the way her nose crinkles when she laughs. She's perfect.

JONATHAN

Yeah.

ANDREW

She's totally hot.

KATRINA

So are you, Master.

ANDREW

(surprised)
You think so?

KATRINA

Oh, yes, Master.

JONATHAN

Okay, so how do we... you know?

ANDREW

Who gets to...

WARREN

I do.

Warren drapes an arm over Katrina's shoulders.

ANDREW

That's not fair.

JONATHAN

Dude, you didn't call it.

WARREN

Oh, I don't have to call it, Sparky. She's mine. But don't worry. You can play with her all you want... after I'm done with her.

Warren leads Katrina to the bedroom as Jonathan and Andrew nervously drink their champagne.

CUT TO:

INT. NERD HIDEOUT-- BEDROOM-- NIGHT

The room is done in shades of red: red sheets, red lava lamp, red curtains.

Katrina shoves Warren across the room and pushes him up against the wall hard. She kisses him passionately and he responds enthusiastically.

WARREN

I missed you so much. You never should have left me. Say it.

KATRINA

I never should have left you, Master.

WARREN

Tell me you love me.

KATRINA

I love you, Master.

Katrina stares straight ahead, the same blank expression on her face, even as she kisses him.

WARREN

Again.

KATRINA

I love you, Master.

WARREN

I love you too, baby. Get on your knees.

KATRINA

Yes, Warren.

She kneels down and Warren looks thrilled. Suddenly his smile fades.

WARREN

Wait, what did you just say?

Katrina looks up at him, his hand on the back of her head.

KATRINA

I said yes, War--

She pauses, confused. Fear washes across Warren's face as Katrina looks at his hand on her head and shoves it away. She looks down at her outfit and stands up, outraged.

KATRINA

What the f--
CUT TO:

INT. NERD HIDEOUT-- MAIN ROOM-- NIGHT

Jonathan and Andrew spar with plastic battery powered Star Wars lightsabers. Warren flies out of the room and falls to the floor. Katrina follows him out and throws her French maid hat at him.

KATRINA

(furious)
What did you do to me?

WARREN

(to Jonathan)
Get the dampener!

Jonathan and Andrew quickly drop their toys and search for the device.

KATRINA

Who the hell are you?

ANDREW

Your masters?

KATRINA

My what?

JONATHAN

Where'd you put it?

ANDREW

You had it last!

Warren stands up and Katrina confronts him.

KATRINA

Are you kidding me?

WARREN

(frantic)
Get the dampener!

KATRINA

You were going to share me with these two dorks?

Warren puts on his protective glasses.

ANDREW

Hey! We're supervillains!

Andrew puts on his glasses and runs over to Katrina with the mind control device.

ANDREW

Call us Master!

Jonathan doesn't have his glasses and quickly shields his eyes as Andrew thrusts his hand out.

JONATHAN

Wait!

The dampener flashes weakly, then sputters out. Katrina stares at it, fuming.

ANDREW

Aw, crap.

JONATHAN

It's out of juice!

KATRINA

(to Warren)
Is that what you used on me? Oh, my god! First the skank-bot and now this? What is wrong with you!

She shoves him in the chest.

WARREN

I just... I wanted us to be together!

KATRINA

There is no "us", Warren! Get that through your big meaty head! I am not your girlfriend anymore!

JONATHAN

(incredulous)

She's your ex?

ANDREW

Dude, that is messed up.

KATRINA

Oh, you think? You bunch of little boys, playing at being men. Well, this is not some fantasy. It's not a game, you freaks! It's rape!

JONATHAN

(stunned)
What?

ANDREW

No, we didn't--

KATRINA

(crying)
You're all sick. (to Warren) And I'm going to make sure you get locked up for this. And then we'll see how you like getting raped.

She heads for the stairs.

WARREN

Stop her!

Andrew and Jonathan each grab one of her arms but Katrina fights back.

KATRINA

Get off me!

She elbows Andrew in the face and knees Jonathan in the groin. They both instantly drop to the floor, incapacitated.

As Katrina starts up the stairs, Warren dashes over and grabs her by the shoulder. She pushes him off and rakes her fingernails down his face, drawing blood.

Warren yells in pain, knocks Katrina down, grabs the champagne bottle and brings it down hard on the crown of her head, cracking her skull and killing her instantly.

WARREN

(to Andrew)
Charge the cerebral dampener.

Andrew and Jonathan just stare in shocked silence.

JONATHAN

Warren...

WARREN

Charge the dampener! Andrew... get her up. We'll give her another dose. A strong one. Everything's all right. Everything's gonna be all right.

Andrew touches Katrina's head and his hand comes away covered in blood.

ANDREW

I don't think so. She's dead.
FADE OUT

ACT II

INT. NERD HIDEOUT-- MAIN ROOM-- NIGHT

Resume. Andrew sits on the stairs holding a Kleenex to his mouth.

ANDREW

Oh god, oh god, oh god...

Warren bends over Katrina, examining her.

WARREN

Her neck. It just...

Jonathan shakes his head in denial.

JONATHAN

No, that's... not... this isn't happening.

WARREN

I just, I gotta... I gotta-- let me think.

JONATHAN

What did you do? What the hell did you do?

Jonathan grabs Warren by his shirt but Warren breaks free and shoves Jonathan up against the wall.

WARREN

We did this. Me and Andrew and you. It's on all of us.

ANDREW

Oh god, oh god, oh god...

WARREN

Shut up!

Andrew stops talking and cries quietly.

WARREN

We... we have to get... we have to get rid of it.

JONATHAN

How?

WARREN

Maybe a spell. Can you teleport it out of here?

JONATHAN

No, she's... it's too big.

WARREN

Andrew.

No response.

WARREN

Andrew!

ANDREW

What?

WARREN

Is there any... thing that you can summon? Something that... can devour that much?

ANDREW

Maybe a Jarvlen Flesh Eater but... they're hard to control. It'd go for us, too.

JONATHAN

Oh, well, that's it, man. We're screwed.

WARREN

No, we just have to stay calm.

JONATHAN

Tell that to your girlfriend!

WARREN

Ex-girlfriend!

JONATHAN

It doesn't matter! There's a link. You knew her so there's a link. You don't think Buffy'll be able to put that together? That's what she does. She'll figure it out!

ANDREW

It was an accident. Maybe if we turn ourselves in--

WARREN

No.

JONATHAN

He's right. If we go to the police now--

WARREN

I'm not going to jail.

JONATHAN

We can't hide this! Sooner or later, the Slayer's going to find out she's dead.

WARREN

(considers)

Well, then maybe it should be sooner.

JONATHAN

Are you insane?

WARREN

Listen to me.

JONATHAN

No!

WARREN

Listen! We have two problems: the body and the Slayer. Well, what if there was a way that we could take care of them both... with one big stone?
CUT TO:

INT. THE BRONZE-- NIGHT

Willow sits beside Buffy, staring in horror.

WILLOW

What are they doing?

Xander and Anya are on the dance floor, swing-dancing. They are really into it, having fun, and are actually quite good.

WILLOW

We're not going to have to do that at the wedding, are we? 'Cause there's this last thread of dignity I've been desperately clinging to.

BUFFY

You're still doing okay, right?

WILLOW

Yeah. You know, some days are harder than the really hard days. It's easier like this, though, when I'm not alone.

BUFFY

I'm sorry I haven't been around that much.

WILLOW

No, that's not-- it's okay. We know you've been all tied up.

Buffy looks over at her, guilty.

BUFFY

What?

WILLOW

With your job and the slaying.

Buffy nods, relieved, as Xander and Anya come off the dance floor.

XANDER

Hey, I see sitting where there should be dancing.

ANYA

Come share in the joy of our groove thang.

WILLOW

And despite that, I succumb to the beat.

BUFFY

I think I'll catch the next soul train out.

XANDER

You sure?

She points to her empty cup.

BUFFY

Oh, yeah, you know, glass all the way empty. More nectar required.

XANDER

Cool, well, shimmy on out when you're done lubricating.

Buffy smiles as the others go out onto the dance floor, then heads over to the bar. She waits there for a moment, then changes her mind and climbs the stairs to the overhead catwalk. She leans on the railing and looks down at the dancers.

SPIKE

You see, you try to be with them but you always end up in the dark... with me.

Spike moves up behind Buffy and looks down at Buffy's friends as they dance.

SPIKE

What would they think of you if they found out... all the things you've done?

He puts his hand on her bare shoulder runs it down her arm.

SPIKE

If they knew who you really were?

His hand moves down to her elbow and then on to her waist.

BUFFY

(whispers)
Don't.

SPIKE

Stop me.

Spike's hand moves across Buffy's thigh. She closes her eyes. He pulls her skirt up. She gasps with pleasure.

Spike turns her around to face him. After a moment, he thrusts into her and Buffy moans, her eyes still tightly closed.

SPIKE

No... don't close your eyes.

She opens her eyes.

SPIKE

(re: her friends)
Look at them. That's not your world. You belong in the shadows... with me.

Spike grinds slowly in and out of her whispers into her ear.

SPIKE

Look at your friends... and tell me you don't love getting away with this... right under their noses.

Buffy stares forlornly down at her friends as she lets Spike have his way with her.

CUT TO:

EXT. SUNNYDALE STREETS-- DAY

Xander and Willow walk past the Espresso Pump on their way to the Magic Box. Xander groans and limps.

XANDER

Oh! I think I pulled a jive muscle last night.

WILLOW

(laughs)
The funky monkey claims another victim.

They reach the magick shop just as Tara exits, a large leather-bound book in her arms.

WILLOW

(surprised)
Tara. What are you doing here? I mean, it's okay for you to be here if you have things that... you have to be here for.

XANDER

Yeah, I'm going to go bring Anya up to speed on that monkey situation.

Xander smiles at Tara and heads into the store.

TARA

(to Willow)
There's a monkey problem?

WILLOW

Only if you don't stretch first. (re: book) The Brekenkrieg Grimoire? Light reading?

TARA

Yeah, I was just...

WILLOW

No, it's okay. I didn't expect you to stop doing magick just because... you don't have to hide it. I'm not... I'm doing better. No spells for 32 days. I can even go to the magick shop now as long as someone's with me at all times. But it's better now, it really is... you know, if you were checking on me.

TARA

No, I wouldn't... I was just looking for Buffy.

WILLOW

Oh. Well, I haven't seen her since last night. She's not around much these days. We kinda miss her.

TARA

I'm sure she feels the same way. If you see her, can you tell her that I need to talk to her? It's important.

WILLOW

Yeah. Of course I will.

TARA

Thanks.

Tara starts to walk off, then pauses and turns back.

TARA

Will? I'm glad you're doing better.

She smiles, then walks away.

CUT TO:

EXT. SUNNYDALE CEMETERY-- NIGHT

Buffy moves among the headstones holding a stake.

CUT TO:

INT. SPIKE'S CRYPT-- NIGHT

Spike smokes a cigarette and pours himself a glass of blood. He sprinkles some herb into the blood, then pauses, sensing, something. He looks toward the door and smiles.

CUT TO:

EXT. SUNNYDALE CEMETERY-- NIGHT

Buffy walks up to the crypt and stops at the door, conflicted.

CUT TO:

INT. SPIKE'S CRYPT-- NIGHT

Spike puts his hands on the door, then presses his body against it.

CUT TO:

EXT. SUNNYDALE CEMETERY-- NIGHT

Buffy lifts her hand to knock.

CUT TO:

INT. SPIKE'S CRYPT-- NIGHT

Spike runs his hand up the door and stops pressing his palm flat.

CUT TO:

EXT. SUNNYDALE CEMETERY-- NIGHT

Buffy has her hand on the door in the same place as Spike on the other side.

CUT TO:

INT. SPIKE'S CRYPT-- NIGHT

Spike presses up against the door again, eyes closed, and panting with excitement. He finally can't take it any more and yanks the door open and walks outside. The cemetery is empty. Buffy is gone.

CUT TO:

EXT. SUNNYDALE CEMETERY-- NIGHT

Buffy walks briskly beneath the trees, talking to herself.

BUFFY

Don't think about the evil bloodsucking fiend. Focus on anything but the evil bloodsucking fiend.

A woman's scream comes from the trees to her left. Buffy looks upward.

BUFFY

Thank you!

She breaks into a run.

CUT TO:

Forest clearing. Buffy comes upon a woman running from her two pursuers. One wears a robe, the other is dressed in normal clothes.

Buffy tackles the robed figure and falls to the ground. The attacker is gone. Not escaped, just gone. Buffy looks around, confused, and stands up. She's alone in the forest.

BUFFY

Huh?

The sound of fast-moving air, then whimpering. Buffy spins to find Katrina a few yards away, lying on the ground. She's crying, her hands pressed over her ears, her back to Buffy.

BUFFY

It's okay. I'm going to get you out of here. Can you walk? Are you hurt?

Slipstream sound. Katrina is gone. Voices surround Buffy, whispering.

VOICES

What did you do? What did you do? Buffy...

SPIKE

(o.s.)
Ow!

Slipstream sound. Suddenly Spike is lying on the ground in front of Buffy, his lip cut and bleeding.

SPIKE

Bloody hell! What'd you do that for?

BUFFY

(confused)
Spike?

Slipstream sound. Buffy looks to her right just in time to see a demon in a blue robe attacking her. It decks her in the face.

Now there are three demons. Two attack Buffy while the third fights with Spike. Katrina lies on the ground nearby.

Spike ducks a swing and seizes the demon around the waist. Spike's vampire ascends and he breaks the demon's neck with a violent twist.

Buffy hits a demon in the face, then kicks it to the ground.

SPIKE

Buffy!

Buffy turns from one demon as the other beats her down from behind. Her vision blurs. Slipstream sound.

Buffy finds herself suddenly standing in the empty clearing again. Spike approaches, uninjured, his lip no longer bloody.

BUFFY

Spike. What's happening?

SPIKE

So you thought you could just slip away, then? Vampire, remember? I could feel you.

Slipstream sound. The fight with the three demon's rages again. Buffy blocks a punch, then decks one of the demons. She turns to engage the second creature and throws a punch just as the slipstream sounds again.

Her blow ends connects with Spike's jaw as Katrina runs past. Spike lands on his ass in front of Buffy, his lip bleeding.

SPIKE

Ow! Bloody hell! What'd you do that for?

Katrina falls to the ground, crying.

Buffy doesn't know where to turn. She tries to get her bearings as the air before her ripples and the three demons appear and charge her.

Buffy engages them again as Spike takes the third.

Buffy punches one demon and he goes down next to Katrina as she turns to the other. The first demon gets up and Buffy swings at him.

Slipstream sound. Buffy stumbles as her punch connects with empty air.

Slipstream sound. Something hits Buffy in the face.

Slipstream sound. Buffy holds a dead demon in her arms.

Slipstream sound. A demon punches Buffy and her head snaps backward.

Slipstream sound. A dead demon lies on the ground behind her. Spike fights the third demon a short distance away.

SPIKE

Buffy!

Buffy spins around, takes a punch to the face and retaliates, pummeling the second demon until

it drops.

Something grabs Buffy by the shoulder and she spins, backhanding Katrina before she realizes who it is. She watches in horror as Katrina tumbles backward over the edge of a ravine and rolls to the bottom. Buffy runs down after Katrina and kneels next to her still form.

Spike straddling the third demon, is distracted by Buffy's sudden disappearance and pays for it with a vicious punch to the head.

SPIKE

Buffy! (to demon) Do you mind?

Spike punches his fist through the demon's chest and out its back. He shoves the dead creature off of him, then runs down into the ravine after Buffy.

He finds Buffy is kneeling beside Katrina, staring at her.

SPIKE

Buffy?

BUFFY

She's dead. I killed her.

Several dozen yards away, Katrina stands in the shadows of a tree, peering through its branches at Buffy and Spike standing over her dead body.

FADE OUT

ACT III

EXT. SUNNYDALE CEMETERY-- NIGHT

Resume. Buffy stares down at Katrina's corpse. Spike looks around, anxious.

SPIKE

We have to go.

BUFFY

(to herself)
What happened?

SPIKE

There's nothing you can do now. We have to go before someone sees you.

BUFFY

What did I do?

SPIKE

We have to go, now!

He grabs Buffy by the arms and drags her to her feet.

CUT TO:

The other side of the cemetery. Still in shock, Buffy lets Spike pull her along by one arm. He pushes her up against a tree and shakes her out of her daze.

SPIKE

All right. Listen to me. Buffy. Buffy!

BUFFY

She's dead.

SPIKE

It was an accident.

BUFFY

I killed her.

SPIKE

I'm going to get you home.

BUFFY

No!

SPIKE

(firm)
I'm going to get you home and you're going to crawl in your warm comfy bed and stay there! We're going to sort this out. Trust me.

Buffy stares at him in anguish.

CUT TO:

INT. NERDS' VAN-- NIGHT

The monitor zooms in on Buffy's face. Warren and Andrew sit side-by-side in the van watching her. Warren makes a triumphant gesture.

WARREN

Two problems... one stone.

The door opens and they turn as Katrina climbs in and leans against the counter. A bright purple bruise covers her cheek-- evidence of Buffy's strength.

WARREN

Nice job. She totally bought it.

KATRINA

Yeah.

Katrina shimmers and ripples and turns into Jonathan. The bruise doesn't disappear, however. It covers Jonathan's face in the same place.

JONATHAN

Some of my best work.

ANDREW

What happens now?

JONATHAN

(bitter)
Well, the night's young. Gotta be some more girls we could kill.

WARREN

We stick to the plan! Buffy thinks she killed Katrina. Well, it's her problem now.
CUT TO:

INT. SUMMERS HOME-- BUFFY'S ROOM-- NIGHT

Buffy lies in bed, asleep but tossing and turning.

VOICES

(whisper)
What did you do... Buffy... what did you do...

She turns over trying to block the voices in her head.

SPIKE

It's all right, luv.

He appears behind her, sliding under the covers naked. Buffy opens her eyes and frowns.

SPIKE

Shh, it's all right. It'll be our little secret.

He kisses her bare shoulder. Buffy turns to face him, then grabs his head and kisses him passionately. She rolls him over on top of him.

FLASH CUT TO:

Naked, Buffy straddles Spike, riding him, eyes closed with pleasure as she moves rhythmically on top of him. She opens her eyes and looks down at him. He smiles back up at her. She runs her hands up his arms. Reveal Spike's hands handcuffed together over his head.

Buffy's movements become more urgent, her breath comes in throaty gasps as her orgasm approaches. As she climaxes, she arches her back and throws her head back in ecstasy.

FLASH CUT TO:

Buffy straddles Katrina in the forest, holding her cuffed hands down.

BUFFY

Do you trust me?

Katrina smiles and moans sexually.

FLASH CUT TO:

Buffy and Spike lie on the floor of his crypt beneath the rugs having passionate sex. Spike is on top, thrusting hard into her and Buffy cries out her pleasure.

FLASH CUT TO:

The graveyard. Buffy decks Katrina.

FLASH CUT TO:

The crypt. Buffy straddles Spike, bucking wildly on top of him. In the midst of her sexual frenzy, she raises a stake over her head and looks down at Spike's bare chest, his closed eyes.

She brings the stake down in a vicious arc.

FLASH CUT TO:

Buffy straddles Katrina who lies dead beneath her, eyes closed, a stake embedded in her chest.

Her eyes snap open: Spike's eyes.

FLASH CUT TO:

Buffy starts awake in her own bed, still wearing her clothes and lying on top of the covers. She looks around, frightened and confused.

CUT TO:

INT. SUMMERS HOME-- DAWN'S ROOM-- NIGHT

Dawn lies in bed sleeping, her arm curled around a teddy bear.

Buffy enters, a leather jacket on over her clothes. She stands for a moment and watches her sister sleeping peacefully, then sits down on the bed beside her. She puts a hand on Dawn's arm, gently waking her.

BUFFY

Hey.

DAWN

What time is it?

BUFFY

It's late. I just wanted... (beat) I love you. You know that, right?

Alarmed, Dawn sits up.

DAWN

What's wrong?

Tears glisten in Buffy's eyes.

BUFFY

I know I haven't been everything I should be... everything Mom was... but I love you. I always will.

DAWN

Why are you talking like this? Buffy?

BUFFY

There was an accident. In the woods. A girl... she was hurt. I hurt someone.

DAWN

Oh, my god. Is she all right?

BUFFY

No. I'm sorry.

Dawn hugs her tightly.

BUFFY

There's something I have to do. I have to tell what I did. I have to go to the police.

DAWN

The police?

BUFFY

Dawnie, I have to.

DAWN

But... what's going to happen?

BUFFY

I don't know.

DAWN

They'll take you away. Won't they?

BUFFY

I'm sorry.

DAWN

No, you're not. You're never here. You can't even stand to be around me.

BUFFY

That is not true.

DAWN

You don't want to be here with me. You didn't want to come back. I know that. You were happier where you were. You want to go away again.

BUFFY

Dawn...

DAWN

Then go! You're not really here anyway.

Dawn gets out of bed and runs out of the room.

CUT TO:

EXT. SUNNYDALE POLICE DEPARTMENT-- NIGHT

Various officers go in and out of the brightly-lit building. Buffy exits the alley next to the station and heads for the main entrance. Spike steps out of the shadows and blocks her.

SPIKE

What do you think you're doing?

BUFFY

The right thing. For once.

Spike grabs her by the shoulders and pulls her back into the alley. She struggles against him and he spins her around and throws her to the ground.

SPIKE

Sorry, luv. Can't let you do that.

BUFFY

I have to tell them what happened.

SPIKE

Nothing happened.

BUFFY

I killed that girl.

SPIKE

Demons in the woods? Time going wonky? They won't believe you.

BUFFY

I'll show them.

SPIKE

(cool)
Show them what?

Buffy's expression turns to anger as she realizes what he's saying.

BUFFY

What did you do?

SPIKE

I took care of it.

BUFFY

(hard)
What did you do?

SPIKE

What I had to. I went back and I took care of it. It doesn't matter now. No one will ever find her.

Two COPs run out the door at the front of the station and rush to their cars.

COP #1

Where'd they find her?

COP #2

The river. She washed up half a mile from the cemetery.

Spike rolls his eyes.

SPIKE

Oh, balls.
FADE OUT

ACT IV

EXT. SUNNYDALE POLICE DEPARTMENT-- NIGHT

Two squad cars tear out of the lot, strobes flashing, siren wailing.

SPIKE

There still isn't anything to connect this to you.

BUFFY

It doesn't matter.

SPIKE

It wasn't your fault!

BUFFY

I killed her!

SPIKE

It was an accident. It just happened.

BUFFY

Nothing just happens.

Buffy starts to head for the station and Spike grabs her arm.

SPIKE

You're not going in there.

BUFFY

I have to do this. Just let me go.

SPIKE

I can't. I love you.

BUFFY

No, you don't.

SPIKE

You think I haven't tried not to?

Buffy decks him, the force of her punch lifting him off his feet and hurling him backward into a group of garbage cans.

BUFFY

Try harder.

She starts to head for the front doors again but Spike leaps up behind her, the vampire in him ascendant. He seizes her by the shoulders and throws her to the ground.

SPIKE

You are not throwing your life away over this.

BUFFY

It's not your choice.

SPIKE

Why are you doing this to yourself?

BUFFY

(sobs)
A girl is dead because of me.

SPIKE

And how many people are alive because of you? How many have you saved? One dead girl doesn't tip the scale.

BUFFY

That's all it is to you, isn't it? Just another body!

SPIKE

Buffy--

She attacks him with a flurry of blows, driving him to the ground.

BUFFY

You can't understand why this is killing me, can you?

SPIKE

Why don't you explain it?

She continues to beat on him violently and powerfully while she talks, her emotions coming out in a flood. He takes every blow, not fighting back, not even trying to block her punches.

SPIKE

Come on, that's it! Put it on me. Put it all on me. (she kicks him) That's my girl.

BUFFY

(screams)
I am not your girl!

She jumps on top of him and rains blows down on his head and chest.

BUFFY

You don't have a soul! There is nothing good or clean in you. You are dead inside! You can't feel anything real! I could never be your girl!

She continues beating him until his face is a bloody pulp. She finally catches herself and looks down at him in horror.

SPIKE

You always hurt the one you love, pet.

Buffy gets up and stares at him through her tears, silent.

SPIKE

Buffy?

Her expression hardens and she walks with determination toward the police station. Spike tries to reach for her but can't.

SPIKE

Buffy...
CUT TO:

INT. SUNNYDALE POLICE DEPARTMENT-- DUTY DESK-- NIGHT

Buffy enters and looks around, then heads for the front desk. The desk SERGEANT is talking on the phone.

SERGEANT

(into phone)
No, no statements. Not until I get confirmation.

BUFFY

(timid)
Excuse me. I need to--

SERGEANT

I'll be with you in a sec.

He answers another line.

SERGEANT

(into phone)
Sunnydale PD. Yeah, the phone's ringing off the hook here.

Buffy turns away, uncertain.

SERGEANT

(into phone)
Listen, you got an ID on that body yet? Yeah? Okay, shoot.

He grabs a pen and writes.

SERGEANT

(into phone)
Katrina... Silber. S-i-l-b-e-r.

Buffy has heard that name before and she frowns as she remembers the April/robot incident.

FLASH TO:

Warren's house:

KATRINA

Warren, just tell her to go away.

WARREN

I can't.

KATRINA

You're keeping secrets from me. Other girls and who knows what else?

WARREN

Trina, shut up.
BACK TO SCENE

BUFFY

Warren...

SERGEANT

(into phone)
Thanks. (hangs up) Now what's the problem, Miss...?

He sees nothing but Buffy's back as she disappears through the door. He shrugs and goes back to work.

CUT TO:

INT. THE MAGIC BOX-- DAY

A book lies on the table, open to a drawing of one of the demons from Buffy's encounter in the forest.

ANYA

Is this what you saw?

Buffy leans over and looks.

BUFFY

Yeah, that's it.

She passes the book to Xander and Willow so they can see as well.

ANYA

The Rwasundi. Very rare. Its presence in our dimension causes a sort of localized temporal disturbance.

BUFFY

So that's why time went all David Lynch?

ANYA

Right. Human perception is based on a linear chronology. Being exposed to the Rwasundi for more than a few seconds can cause vivid hallucinations. And a slight tingly scalp.

WILLOW

So that's it. These things just made you think you killed her.

XANDER

She was probably dead long before you stumbled across her.

BUFFY

It wasn't the demons. It was Warren. He knew Katrina. He had something to do with it, I know it.

WILLOW

How can you be sure?

BUFFY

You always hurt the one you love.

DAWN

(sullen)

Does this mean you're not going away?

Buffy goes over to her sister and smiles.

BUFFY

Yeah. I'm not going anywhere.

Dawn quickly runs out, leaving Buffy to stare after her, hurt. She turns back to her friends.

BUFFY

We need to find Warren and the others. Whatever they've done, they're not going to get away with it.
CUT TO:

INT. NERD HIDEOUT-- DAY

Warren, Jonathan and Andrew are hunched over their computer. Warren works the keyboard and brings up the coroner's report on Katrina's death.

WARREN

We're going to get away with it. "Injuries consistent with a fall."

He points at the screen:

CONFIDENTIAL FILES

Coroner's Summary Report

Ruling:

SUICIDE

Coroner:

Willard Batts

February 01, 2002 @ 0127 hrs

Victim sustained injuries consistent with a fall. Twenty-one-year-old Katrina Silber's death appears to have been caused by an accidental drowning or suicide.

WARREN

The coroner is ruling it a suicide.

JONATHAN

What about Buffy?

WARREN

Well, it wasn't that hard messing her game up. If she figures it out... we'll take care of her.

ANDREW

We really got away with murder. That's... kinda cool.

Andrew and Warren share a smile but Jonathan is less than enthusiastic.

JONATHAN

(weak)
Yeah. Cool.
CUT TO:

INT. SUMMERS HOME-- LIVING ROOM-- DAY

Buffy sits on the coffee table facing Tara on the sofa.

BUFFY

Are you sure?

TARA

I've double checked everything. There's nothing wrong with you.

BUFFY

Then why can Spike hurt me?

TARA

Well, I said that there was nothing wrong with you but... you are different. Shifting you out of from where you were, funneling your essence back into your body... it altered you on a basic molecular level-- probably just enough to confuse the sensors or whatever's in Spike's chip-- but it's all just surfacey physical stuff. It wouldn't have any more effect than a bad sunburn.

Buffy looks close to tears.

BUFFY

I didn't come back wrong?

TARA

No, you're the same Buffy. (smiles) With a deep tropical cellular tan.

BUFFY

You must have missed something. Will you check again?

TARA

Buffy, I promise, there's nothing wrong with you.

BUFFY

There has to be! This just can't be me. It isn't me. Why do I feel like this? Why do I let Spike do those things to me?

TARA

You mean hit you?

Buffy meets Tara's eye for a moment, then looks away. Tara gets it.

TARA

Oh. Oh, huh. Really?

BUFFY

He's everything I hate. He's everything that... I'm supposed to be against. But the only time that I ever feel anything is when... Don't tell anyone, please.

TARA

I won't.

BUFFY

The way they would look at me. I just couldn't...

TARA

I won't tell anyone. I wouldn't do that.

BUFFY

(whispers)
Why can't I stop? Why do I keep letting him in?

TARA

Do you love him? (beat) It's okay if you do. He's done a lot of good and he does love you. And Buffy, it's okay if you don't. You're going through a really hard time and you're...

BUFFY

What? Using him? What's okay about that?

TARA

It's not that simple.

BUFFY

It is! It's wrong. I'm wrong. Tell me that I'm wrong. Please. (sobs) Please don't forgive me, please...

She slides off the table onto the floor and drops her head into Tara's lap, her body wracked with sobs. Tara seems uncomfortable at first, then rubs Buffy's back, comforting her.

BUFFY

Please don't forgive me...
FADE TO BLACK
END